I got in my car and Milo sat beside me. ‘What’s this about?’
I pulled away from the kerb and managed to control myself. I remembered what he’d told me about his theory, but I’d found it disgusting and unbelievable. Now I needed him to repeat it. After he told me, I cried again.
‘What do you know, Erin, did she admit it?’
I took him to Kathy’s house and introduced him as my friend, Michael. I told Kathy we had come to get the mirror. It was after ten o’clock. Kathy questioned if I was okay. I guess I looked like shit compared to a few hours earlier. I asked for aspirin and a glass of water. Milo accepted a coffee, and we made polite conversation for about two minutes before he and I climbed the back stairs. I showed him where the mirror was and the hole in the wall behind it. I demonstrated how the tape had covered it, and then we went into my room and I showed him the spot on the wall above the bookcase.
Milo went quiet. He sat down heavily on the floor and hisface was ashen. I tried to comfort him. ‘Milo, I’m sorry, I should have believed you.’
I tried to put my arms around him, but he shook me off.
‘I was right,’ he said.
‘Yes, you were, and I’m so sorry.’
His face lost its colour. ‘It’s been twenty-six years. My mother jumped into the Charles River because nobody would believe me. You and me, we had planned a life, kids, a whole future. All those years in a stinking cell. Why?’
There were tears streaming down my face. I wanted to hold him but he left the room, and I heard him go down the stairs and out the back door. I followed, expecting to find him standing by my car, but he was gone.
77
Ruby
At forty-two, I was young enough to start over somewhere else, and a town five hours from Perth, Australia, seemed like the ideal place. I checked the visa criteria; I applied for a holiday visa online. The website said it would take forty-eight hours to process, but on a lot of chat forums about holidays, it said that you could get it in a matter of hours. It entitled me to ninety days there. I was sure Uncle Dennis would be pleased to see me, particularly if I was sober. I had run the Academy often single-handedly and admin was admin wherever you went. Surely a mining company had databases and payroll like every other company. He would give me some kind of job and sponsor my work visa. Later, I could investigate citizenship. I could marry a local if necessary. I was leaving Lucy behind, but she would be better off without me. I was a terrible mother. She deserved better. Jack would be a better parent on his own. I loved Jack too. It had been clear to me from when she was about fourteen years old that he loved Lucy more than me. I had wanted to hurt her for taking Jack away from me. I was physically and emotionally exhausted. I changed into my nightwear and got into bed.
It was about 4 a.m. when my phone woke me again. It was Erin. She knew the time difference between Dublin and Boston. It was 11 p.m. there. Was it a pocket dial or had Jackcalled her? They had only met once, around the time of Grandma’s funeral, though they had spoken on the phone a couple of times when we first got married. I let it go without answering. It flashed again over and over. Whatever it was could wait until morning. I was just drifting off again when my phone buzzed and flashed once more. This time it was Mom. It must be serious. I picked up.
‘Erin knows. She called me, almost hysterical.’
I was confused and half asleep. ‘Sorry, what about Erin? What does she know? It’s the middle of the night, Mom.’
‘About you and Milo, how you framed him. She’s furious with me.’ Mom started to cry. ‘She said she’s never going to speak to me again.’
I was wide awake now. ‘You admitted it, you told her the truth?’
‘She knew. Milo worked it out first. Kathy is selling your dad’s house. Erin went to collect some furniture and discovered the hole in the wall.’
‘Milo knows too?’
‘He guessed that you must have seen them and used the tissue, and Erin found the hole behind the mirror. She hates me.’ Mom gasped for breath, in between gales of tears.
‘Oh my God, what is she going to do?’
‘I don’t know. They discovered it tonight. Ruby, what have you done to me?’
‘Me? What have you done? You confirmed it. You could have denied it. There’s no proof. This is your fault.’ I went on the attack.
‘Don’t you understand how hard this was for me? It destroyed my marriage. I have lived with this awful guilt for twenty-five years. You think it hasn’t taken its toll? I was protectingyou. I prayed for that boy every night. I’m glad your father isn’t around to hear this.’
‘Mom, wait, stop, what is Erin going to do? Is Milo going to the cops? Who would believe him?’
‘I don’t know. She’s been trying to reach you –’
I hung up.
78
Lucy
