‘Why not?’
‘You can’t tell whether it’s a boy or a girl until it’s born.’
‘I don’t want a sister.’
‘I wanted to keep you so much.’
‘Here?’
‘No, at home with my family.’
I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want her to be my mum.
I took an apple from my bag. Dad always said I had to eat the healthy things before I could eat the sweet things. I took a big bite out of it and chewed. She stared at me.
‘Get back under the blanket.’
She did, but there was a tiny gap and I could tell she was looking at me through the blanket. I went over and kicked at it. There was a gasp, and she rose again, but this time there was blood on her face.
‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry,’ she said and began to cry.
I didn’t like her bleeding face. ‘Get back under the blanket and don’t look at me. Stupid woman.’
19
Sally
‘I think we need to take the teddy bear with the note and the box and wrapping paper to the guards. They might be able to get some DNA from it,’ said Aunt Christine.
‘Unlikely,’ said Angela. ‘You two have washed most of the evidence away. All three of us have handled the box and wrapping paper. Postal workers in New Zealand and Ireland too, and everywhere in between, but I suppose they might be able to get some information.’
Aunt Christine said, ‘Judging by the style and age of the bear, I’m guessing it was Denise’s. It’s like something from fifty or sixty years ago. Parts of it seem to have been attacked by moths.’
Angela agreed. ‘What did the note say again?’
‘“I thought you’d like to have him back.” No signature. Just a letter “S”.’
‘Maybe Sally had a nickname for her father? Do you remember, Sally?’
Angela put her hand up. ‘I don’t think Sally needs those questions, Christine.’
‘Sorry, you’re right.’
‘I’d like to go to bed to rest for a while,’ I said. ‘With Toby.’
It was five o’clock now and pitch-dark. The two women began to apologize, saying it must be a terrible shock, that I must feel overwhelmed by all of the revelations. Aunt Christine said she would nip into the village to get some provisions and that she would wake me for dinner later. I went to my room and left them to talk about me and my terrible past. I took Toby with me. I was tired of their talking and I wanted time and space to think.
In my room, with the old flowery wallpaper Mum had chosen all those years ago, I tried to think about what I should do. So many questions floated around my head.
Later, I woke to delicious smells coming from the kitchen. I went to the bathroom and washed my face.
Aunt Christine greeted me in the kitchen. ‘Darling, did you have a nice nap? Angela is staying for dinner. I hope you don’t mind. I’ve roasted a chicken.’
‘For three of us?’
‘Yes, you can use leftovers for sandwiches or soup if you like.’
She had also made mashed potato and a carrot and parsnip puree, like something from a TV cookery show. ‘Will you set the table, darling?’
