The kind who knows that as soon as he kisses Savannah Blair like he wants to, he won’t have any rational thoughts running through his head except finding a wall to kiss her against. Or a counter. Basically any solid surface will do.
Anything except Lola Shafer’s front step.
How am I supposed to act normal now? I want more with this woman.
I wantforever.
Dazed and not entirely in control of my faculties, I reluctantly drop my hands from Savannah’s hips and take her hand instead, forcing myself to look away from the tender look in her eyes so it can’t convince me to turn around and leave before everything changes. If I don’t do this now, it’ll never happen, and I can’t spend my life driven by hurt and regret.
Each step toward the door is harder than the last, but somehow I make it to the porch and rap a weak knock against the wood.
Savannah gives my hand a squeeze, and her support feels like it might be enough to hold me together through anything. “Ready?” she asks.
“No,” I croak back.
The door opens, and I hold my breath.
Lola sees Savannah first and smiles, wrinkles forming around her eyes. Eyes like mine. “Savannah, hon, you know you don’t need to knock. Come…” Her smile drops when her eyes jump to me, the color draining from her face and leaving her trembling. “Oh.”
“Lola,” Savannah says gently, “this is—”
“Logan.” Lola takes half a step back, and I don’t miss the way her hand grips the door, ready to slam it shut.
I can’t let her do that. Not now that I’m here. “I know you don’t want to talk.” My voice is hoarse, rasping from my dry throat. “I’m not here for money or a place in your life. I just need to know.”
“Know?” she repeats weakly.
I nod. “Why.”
Tears fill her eyes, and she glances behind her. The house is quiet, but that doesn’t mean no one else is here. The boys could be sleeping in. Her husband might be in the other room. I desperately hope she’s here alone.
“Please,” I beg. “That’s all I want.”
Lola looks from me to Savannah, then down at our clasped hands, and hurt flashes across her features. Is she feeling cornered? Betrayed?
I step forward, realizing my mistake when Lola shrinks back. I’m too big and imposing to not frighten her when she’s already on her guard, so I need to give her space. And I need to make sure she understands that none of this is Savannah’s fault. “I met Savannah a few months ago,” I say as gently as I can. “I…” Meeting Savannah’s wary gaze, I frown and decide to stick to the truth. “I forced her into a deal. If she got me a conversation with you, I’d help her with her business. She never wanted to be in the middle of this. I came here on my own.”
Though I hate it, I slowly let Savannah’s hand drop from mine. “Go,” I tell her quietly. “We’ll be okay.”
Hesitating, she looks at me for a long time before her gaze shifts to Lola. “I’m here to make your meals if you still want me to. It’s okay if you don’t.”
Lola swallows, then nods without looking away from me.
Touching my elbow briefly, Savannah heads back to her car to grab her supplies.
Lola opens the door a little wider. “Do you want to come in? I don’t have a lot of time. My, uh…” She pales slightly. “My husband is golfing, but I have two boys. They’ll be home soon.”
Part of me wants to tell her that I’ve met them. Spoken to them. But I’m terrified that if she learns I crossed that line, she’ll shut the door on me and never give me the conversation I need. If she asks, I won’t lie, but I’ll keep that truth to myself for now.
“I won’t stay long,” I promise and take a tentative step inside. Then another.
Lola wanders to the nearest armchair and sinks into it, leaving the door open.
A moment later, Savannah comes inside and pauses halfway through closing the door as she takes in Lola’s trembling frame. “Are you sure it’s okay that I’m here?” she asks gently.
Exhaling shakily, Lola nods again. She waits until Savannah disappears deeper into the house, and then she clasps her hands in her lap. Her voice is thin as she asks, “You…and Savannah?”
I sit on the couch across from her and nod, allowing a quick smile because I can’t help it. “She’s brilliant. Inspiring. And she puts me in my place more often than I’d like. I never planned to fall for her, but…” But that’s all I’ll say until I can say it to Savannah first.
