I have to wait.
And waiting is the hardest part. My heart lurches at the thought of Emery, somewhere miles away, grappling with life-changing decisions while I sit here, powerless. I close my eyes and picture the way she wraps her dark hair around her finger when she’s lost in a thought.
No matter how logical Henry might be, I know she’ll come back to me. Call me an idiot if you want, but no matter how much I’ve changed, I’ll be her idiot. Always.
CHAPTER 25
EMERY
At the beginning of summer, I was sure Honey Grove was trying to reject me, but now I’m wondering if the mystical forces at hand are trying to keep me here.
Or maybe it’s just him. No matter how hard I try to pull away, Knox is still there like a really stubborn rubber band that refuses to snap.
The reaffirming sign of my rusty pick-up trying to turn over for the tenth time burns in my ears. “Ugh,” I groan, leaning my head back. The same Honey Grove welcome sign that reconnected me with my past glares down at me.
I glance at the time on my phone, and my hopes of getting to my sister’s at a decent time slowly fade away.
After pacing back and forth in my apartment last night and annoying Klepto as he tried to sleep, I realized that if I wanted to clear my head and make a decision about my life, and about him, I needed to get out of Honey Grove for a little bit.
Was it a sad cop-out? Yes. But I needed the stoic wisdom of my little brother and the sharp, no-nonsense advice of mybig sister. And if that means running off for a few days, so be it.
My fingers wrap around the key again as I send up one silent prayer. But apparently God isn’t taking requests right now because the engine lets out one weak cough before settling into a mocking silence. A frustrated laugh pours out of me.
Unfortunately, there’s only one clear solution to my problem, and I basically told that solution to go fuck itself last night. But I know if I call, he’ll pick up and come barreling down here with his heroic curls floating in the wind. Yet another reason that proves to me that he’s changed. Even if I wasn’t looking for a hero, he’d always be mine. I guess that’s one thing to throw into the “reasons for staying” column.
My hand shakes as my thumb hovers over his contact on my phone. I take one deep, much-needed breath before pressing the call button.
He only lets the phone ring once before he answers.
“This doesn’t feel like space, Bambi,” he says, not bothering with a hello.
“Yeah, I know,” I reply, trying to keep my voice steady, “and I wouldn’t have called if I didn’t need you.”
“What’s wrong?” he asks quickly. A rustling sound fills the background of him grabbing his keys or pulling on a shirt. I can just picture him jumping into action, and it makes me feel…wanted. Something I’ve never had to doubt when I’m with him. Even when we were just faking it.
“The truck broke down on me again,” I sigh, pushing my bangs away from my forehead. “It looks like I need a tow.”
“Shit, really?” he asks. The sound of a door shutting filters through the speaker. “That shouldn’t have happened. Where are you?”
“Uhh, remember where you picked me up the first time?” I ask.
“Yes,” Knox answers with a light chuckle. “I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
He doesn’t take ten. He takes five, which tells me he sped the entire way here. Anxiety pools in my stomach when I see him. I was right when I asked for space because being near him makes me lose my grip on that small string of control I hold so tightly. I want to ignore everything and run straight into his arms.
When he gets out of the truck, he stops for a moment. My breath gets stuck in my lungs when our eyes connect, and I feel that gravitational pull toward him. But I keep my feet planted.
He shakes his head before clearing his throat. “I’ve got to say this is a little bit of a hit to my ego, Bambi. I’ve never had this much trouble with an engine.”
I muster up a weak smile, even though the tension between us is enough to crumple under. “I guess there are some things that even the great Knox Cooke can’t fix.”
His smile slips for a second and I feel a rush of guilt assault me. “That’s not what I meant,” I say, trying to cover up my ignorance. “I mean?—”
“We don’t have to talk about it,” he says, but I see the flicker of uncertainty in his eyes. He promised me space, and for once, Knox is holding back. It almost makes me miss his unfiltered spirit that I seemingly stomped out. Guilt rages inside my mind. “Let’s just focus on getting you back on the road.”
Knox walks up to the front of the truck, but then he stops dead in his tracks. When I look up, his eyes are glued to my large suitcase sitting on the bed.
“Wait a second,” he says, spinning to face me. “You didn’t mean space in the literal sense right? You’re not seriously running away.”
