The stink eye continues as he places the full glass in front of me, a little sloshing out to slide down the side. At this point, I’m determined not to let him know he’s getting to me, so instead of looking away, I stare right back at him and ostentatiously lick the spill off the side before taking several gulps. His eyes narrow, like he’s not sure what I’m trying to do here—newsflashbuddy, me neither—but there’s a slightly uncomfortable shift to his posture and he finally looks away.
I take a few more deep sips, letting it calm me and walk myself back from this weird interaction. I just need to reclaim the peacefulness I was beginning to feel before, and then I’ll be good to call it a night.
“Cade!”
The voice that pierces the general din of the crowd and music is one that I’d recognize anywhere. I keep the glass to my face, intently swallowing the rest of it before a very tiny tornado of affection slams into me.
“I didn’t expect you to be here!” Wish says a hair too loud, like she’s already drunk herself.
Abort. Abort. Abort.
I move to throw some cash on the bar and bounce, but then realize I’m an idiot with empty pockets and I’ll need to take the time to pay by card.
“Can I close out?” I ask Sav quickly, and he eventually nods and goes to get my check.
“I’m not here. I just wanted a quick drink after work, I gotta get home.”
When I finally turn and look Wish in the eye, her head is cocked to the side and she’s looking me up and down.
“Are you okay?” she asks, her voice sinking as her whole demeanor shifts to something serious.
Putting a smile on my face feels like clawing out a piece of skin from my insides to slap it over my outsides, but I do it. I think it’s even convincing. One megawatt, charming smile to throw the emotional bloodhound off my scent.
I follow it with a big yawn, which is only a little fake.
“Yeah, I’m just tired. I’ve been on nights.”
Wish looks from side to side, taking in my lack of company.
“Where’s Silas?”
“At home. We have the girls right now. My dad’s in town and he’s shacked up at the trailer with my mom and a literal hooker who apparently bankrolled his attempt to flee Alabama. It’s a whole thing. I would have told you about it, but I didn’t want to distract you from your big expo debut. How was it?”
“Awesome,” she says, enthusiastic for only a second before her brows dip and she ingests everything I said. “Shit, is everything okay? I can’t believe you didn’t tell me. You know you could have interrupted me for this. I only got into town this afternoon, I was going to hit you up tomorrow.”
Another wrung-out fake smile flits across my face, and I reach out to squeeze her shoulder in an attempt to sell it.
“Nah, it’s not a big deal. You know what he’s like, it’ll blow over soon. We’re all good.”
She doesn’t look convinced, but Kasia interrupts to put down the check that Sav obviously couldn’t be fucked to walk back over here, and ask Wish if she wants a drink.
“Whiskey soda, please,” she says, eyeing my check.
I cover it quickly with my debit card and slide it to Kasia before she can walk away. The last thing I need is Wish getting on me about having two fucking drinks—okay, two drinks and a shot, but sambuca doesn’t count—and driving, as if two-thirds of the people in here won’t be driving themselves home tonight.
Just because it’s normalized doesn’t mean it’s normal.
It’s been her favorite phrase for a while, and I hate it. Just because she’s right doesn’t mean it isn’t exhausting. I love my best friend, but the thought of being near her when I’m trying to unravel is too much. Too much goodness. I just need to be alone.
Fuck it. There are other bars in this town. Ones where I won’t run into anyone who cares about me, and I’ll be left alone. I just want one more drink, and then I’ll go home. And I’ll eat something.
Just a little more time to clear my head.
Chapter Twenty-One
It’s 1 a.m.. Cade is still not home, and he stopped answering my messages over an hour ago.
This is absolutely not what we agreed on. I get that he’s going through something, and if he was spending the night with Wish or something just to get away, I would understand. I’d hate it, but I’d understand. But I can’t just not know where he is or if anything has happened to him.
