Zoe studied her as covertly as she could. She hadn’t wanted to ask for fear of stoking the angry side of her, but Billie’s hair didn’t look washed. Zoe couldn’t recall her going up to wash it since they got home. She said she’d been showering, but Zoe couldn’t even be sure of that. Whenever she needed to leave Louisa to do something for herself, she was gone for minutes at the most, and so if she was doing any personal hygiene, it had to be the bare minimum. It was funny because Zoe had visited so many new mothers over the years, but she’d never spent extended periods of time with them. She’d seen them washed and dressed and at their best ready for her visit, but once she’d gone, did they become as Billie was? She felt lacking because she felt she ought to know if this was normal or not, but she didn’t. No amount of training or knowledge had prepared herfor living with a new mother, especially one with such a complex relationship with motherhood. Was Billie regretting her decision to keep Louisa after all? Was she feeling guilt for the very notion that she had almost given her away? Zoe had tried to encourage her, subtly, to talk about these things, but Billie simply refused to be drawn. She’d wondered whether to mention her concerns to Alex, but she didn’t want to worry him because he was in a period of adjustment, just like everyone else.
As she watched Billie go to the window with Louisa in her arms, she wondered whether the best approach was just to be direct and ask. But would Billie recognise an issue within her own mental state, even if it was there?
‘Old Banger is coming up the drive,’ Billie said.
Zoe joined her at the window to see the Land Rover pull up. Victor and Corrine got out, arms filled with gifts and flowers. She couldn’t help but smile at the sight of them. They were such a wholesome couple, nobody could be anything but happy to see them, no matter what else was going on.
‘I’ll go and let them in…’ she began, but it seemed Alex had noticed their arrival too because in the next second she heard his voice at the front door and then their replies. Then the door slammed shut and he led them into the living room.
‘We should have phoned,’ Corrine said. ‘But Victor said you’d taken the week off so there would be someone in.’
‘And she couldn’t wait to see the baby,’ Victor added. ‘Which means if we’d phoned and you’d said not to come, I’d have had to look at her disappointed face for the rest of the day.’
‘You’re always welcome – no need to stand on ceremony.’ Alex shoved his hands in his pockets and looked at Zoe and Billie for agreement.
Billie seemed to brighten a little at the idea that Corrine had been desperate to see the new arrival. She went over with Louisa in her arms.
‘Oh!’ Corrine stepped forward to get a better look. ‘Isn’t she perfect? Absolutely beautiful! Look at all that hair already! And the little fingers…Oh, Victor, isn’t she gorgeous?’
‘Ah…’ He gave a gruff nod, beaming behind his beard. ‘She is.’
It was strange because Zoe wasn’t related by blood and yet she was proud. Proud to be part of Alex’s and Billie’s, and now Louisa’s, lives. She was proud of Billie for making it this far, proud of how hard she was trying.
‘We didn’t know what to get…’ Victor gave Alex the flowers.
‘Oh, Victor, you didn’t have to, but they’re lovely. Didn’t you get anything for Billie though?’
Victor let out a husky laugh. ‘Daft bugger. Flowers generally go down all right for this sort of thing, don’t they?’
‘Thank you,’ Billie said.
‘And we got this for the little one…’ Corrine held out a floppy felt alpaca dressed in ribbons and a brightly patterned blanket.
‘That’s so cute!’ Zoe cooed.
‘Thought it seemed apt,’ Victor said. ‘And of course, madam here has baked something.’
Corrine gave the toy to Zoe and then opened a box she’d been balancing on one arm. Inside was a cake, decorated with sugar flowers and iced with the words:Welcome, Baby Louisa!
‘Wow, that’s lovely!’ Zoe said.
‘Fantastic!’ Alex agreed. He turned to Billie. ‘What do you think, eh? Corrine’s a baking genius!’
‘Aww, I’m not.’ Corrine flushed at the compliment. ‘I’m only an old hand at it. Old hand in general, now I come to think of it.’
‘But still the loveliest hands,’ Victor said in the gruffly earnest tone he used when he wanted to let Corrine know how much he loved her. Zoe had sometimes wondered whether he’d ever said those three words. She’d never heard him, but the way he wasstill besotted after all these years was evident in everything he said and did.
‘I made a fruit one,’ Corrine said, going back to the cake. ‘So it will keep for years.’
Billie frowned. ‘Why would I want to keep it for years? How come it doesn’t go off?’
‘Anything keeps with enough booze.’ Victor tapped the side of his nose. ‘It used to be a thing for wedding cakes, didn’t it? You’d keep the top tier for the christening of the first baby.’
‘Oh…’ Billie looked as if she wasn’t sure what she was meant to do with that information. ‘Well, thanks. It’s a lovely cake.’
‘You don’t have to keep it,’ Corrine said. ‘Eat it whenever you like.’
‘That’s good,’ Alex said. ‘Because I doubt it will last long around here. I was just going to make tea if you want a cup. We can cut it up with that.’
