“Some things,” River said quietly, “only heal when I’m here. With you.”
Newt swallowed, breath hitching, and slid his arm around River’s back. “Lucky me.”
Epilogue
A year later
River was acting his heart out. He was trying to look completely comfortable, unconcerned about what the evening might bring, just appearing happy to be there, while frantically talking himself down from the idea that he might be going home with an Oscar. He really didn’t think it was going to happen, but every time someone passed him and patted his back or caught his eye and wished him good luck, he felt a surge of hope, a flicker of possibility and had to quickly knock some sense into himself again.
“Are you all right?” Newt asked quietly.
Newt had the uncanny ability to know when he wasn’t.
River shot him a smile. “I’m wondering if I should go to the loo before it starts.”
“Need a hand?” Newt licked his lips.
River laughed and pushed to his feet. “Yes, but no.”
As he moved away, a sitter slid into River’s aisle seat next to Newt. It was like musical chairs, spotters on alert for people leaving their places ready to direct someone to fill the space. At all times, the venue had to look full. River passed a line of well-dressed sitters as he headed for the bathroom. Unpaid work but highly prized.
To his amazement, River had won a BAFTA forMedway Boysand been nominated for a Golden Globe but missed out to the actor he thought would probably get the Oscar tonight. Alex Morgan was in his fifties, beloved by many, had been nominated three times and never won. River was a gayupstart.
Max had railed publicly about the ongoing issue of openly gay actors not receiving awards, let alone getting some of the roles they deserved and how it was time things changed. There had been a lot in the press about it. Times were changing, but not quickly.
He practised his smile before he went back to his seat. The one that saidI’m so pleased for you. I never thought I had a chance. You were brilliant in…whatever film they’d been in. ProbablyJourneyif it was Alex Morgan.
River thanked the sitter as he gave up the seat, then made sure he brushed Newt’s arm as he dropped down next to him.
Max leaned across Newt. “No more to drink.”
River immediately reached for the bottle of water under his seat and drank some. Though Max was right. He didn’t want to miss a thing running back to the bathroom.
The evening started with a lavish musical performance followed by the host, a comedian River didn’t usually find funny, warming up the audience. The first award was a big one to set the tone. Best Supporting Actor. Omid Bakri, River’s counterpart inMedway Boys, had a nomination, though he wasn’t a favourite to win. Max had been pissed off at Omid’s nomination but only because it lessened River’s chances of winning. Apparently Best Actor and Best Supporting Actor had gone to the same film onlysix timesin Academy Awards history.
Prior to coming into the main part of the theatre, River had seen Omid in one of the green rooms with his mum and dad. He and Omid had hugged each other and had a short conversation. River knew his parents hadn’t been happy about their son playing the role of a gay man. He wondered if thechance of Omid winning an Oscar had changed that. When they’d started filmingMedway BoysOmid had told River that he wasn’t gay, and River had said the same thing, though he’d wondered if Omid was lying. Their onscreen chemistry had been electric and the scene where Omid had come out to his parents had been phenomenal.
When Omid’s name was announced as the winner, River leapt to his feet and applauded loudly. He was genuinely thrilled for him, almost relieved that his chances of winning had now significantly reduced. It took the pressure off.
Omid made a short speech, thanking everyone in the world, including River, and the show went on.
And on.
And on.
“My hands hurt,” Newt said in his ear.
River laughed. “So do mine.”
“I don’t know if I’ll have the energy to clap for you. Sorry.”
“It won’t be me.”
Max reached across Newt and squeezed River’s fingers. River turned to him.
“You deserve it,” Max mouthed.
River could almost feel the rise in anticipation. The big four awards were coming. Starting with Best Actor.
