Byron scanned his mate’s face. Derek wasn’t smiling. Wasn’t taking the piss at all.
“Urgh,” he said with a grin. “Hang on, are you tryna claim you’re a bigger freak than me?”
Derek shrugged.
“Fuck you. You don’t know that.”
“I’ll never know anything if you don’t tell me, bloke.”
“Fine.” Longing for another pint and a last chance not to engage, Byron also looked over his shoulder. Sure enough, Willow and Patrick were deep in conversation with the bartender. He sighed. “Beth wants to do this cheating thing. Pretend she’s the kid’s nanny.”
Derek raised his eyebrows. “Nice. Problem?”
“The cheating thing at my old club was so fucking stupid I wanted to castrate everyone?”
“Yeah, pretty close to home. Some stuff sticks, hey?”
“It does.”
“But I mean, without me knowing the blokes involved, that was just ego bullshit. Fucking the big dog’s wife in his own house. You’re just giving him the finger, aren’t you?”
“Pretty much.”
Derek’s nostrils flared. “I’d’ve murdered the cunt. Anyone eventhinksabout going near Mara?—”
“Yeah, yeah, we all know you’re the toughest, Big D. My point is, I don’t want Beth getting the idea she needs to be someone else for me to be into her.”
Derek relaxed back into the booth. “Ah, but that’s different, bloke. If you were actually getting antsy, I’d tell you to sort your shit out. But playing around with your own missus isn’t the same thing.”
“But sometimes Beth does get freaked out thinking I’m gonna fuck someone else.”
Derek shot him a look.
“I haven’t given her a fucking reason! I just know she thinks about it. She’s always said I’m, like…” Byron’s ears went hot. There was no way he was telling Derek Hardiman his wife thought he was better-looking than she was. He’d never hear the end of it. “… she gets worked up about the age difference, is all.”
Derek snorted. “What age difference? You’ve got the brain of a ninety-year-old. With ringworms.”
“Tell Beth that.”
“Maybe I will…”
“Shut up. Heard you and Mara choke each other out on weeknights.”
“And how.” Derek stretched his arms over his head. “You guys do this kinda… Sex stuff… Before the kid?”
Byron nodded.
“Then I still don’t see the problem. You’ll rock up at the house; she’ll pretend to be… y’know. And it’ll all go from there.”
Byron tried to imagine talking to Beth as though she was someone else. A nanny the two of them had hired to look after Simon. “I don’t think I can.”
“Explain.”
“Fuck off.”
“One last push, bloke. Say the words.”
Byron rolled his eyes. “Fine. I don’t wanna tell her we can’t mess around, but I don’t think Beth knows how hard the depression hit her. I don’t think I can make things feel like they did before.”
