“For what?”
“For everything. I wish I could change things for you. I wish I could send you back in time, back to your forest with your nymph, when life was simple and happy. I wish I could go back to California and be content on the beach, reading trashy novels and painting my nails. But we can’t—”
“Are you sure?”
“What?”
He moved closer to her. “We could go. To the human world, both of us.”
She stared at him for a long moment, speechless.
“I know you think you have a duty to the Lands,” he said, “to the small folk and Ouda, to me and Honey, to Damion and your family, but you don’t. Not really. It’s not fair, Magda. It’s not right for all of them to demand you to sacrifice yourself for what they want.”
“I thought you agreed with the Resistance, with Python and—”
“I do,” he said. “But—” He ran his hand over his face, shaking his head as if he didn’t even understand what he was saying or why.
“And what about Honey? You know nymphs can’t leave the Lands. They’ve tried. They’ve died.”
“She would be safer if she stopped following us. If she went home.”
She found it hard to breathe. The air grew too thick and warm. His words—the same words she’d spoken to Endreas only a week before—left her dumbfounded.
To go back to California, away from all of this... But why was he suggesting this to her now? Did he feel guilty about giving her a piece of his heart? As if he owed it to her to protect their lives so that she wouldn’t go mad if he died? Was he afraid? Had he finally realized how difficult it would be to defend himself, let alone start a war against the King?
She was deeply tempted to accept and leave all of this behind for good. But she just... couldn’t. Even when she’d asked Endreas before, she’d known she wouldn’t really be able to go through with it. The Rae part of her was still too strong. Besides, others were counting on her... Ouda, Tamia, Hero.
“I don’t really believe you want to go into exile,” she said finally. “I think you want to stay.”
“We’re not talking about what I want,” he said.
“I thought you wanted to get away from me,” she said in a challenging tone, disturbed by how enticed she was by his offer—even though she knew she couldn’t accept. Some distant voice, that woman she’d been in exile, was still begging to leave the Lands and all its troubles behind. “Why would you want to go into exile with me?”
“I don’t really want to get away from you, Magda. I think... Ishouldwant to. Sometimes I feel like I need to, but that’s not what I want.”
“Then—”
“If we’re staying,” he cut in strongly, “then we’re staying. And we’re doing this together, right?”
“Right,” she said.
“Then you have to be honest.”
“I have been—” She bit her cheek, catching the lie. “All right. But honesty isn’t exactly in our nature, and it’s not always what it’s cracked up to be. Sometimes it’s better to lie than to start a war.”
“But our lives are in too much danger right now. I need to know I can depend on you. That I can trust you.”
“You mean you need something to hold on to.”
He hung his head. “Magda—”
“And I’m here,” she said. “Just like I was before, right?”
He nodded, grim-faced.
She folded her arms as the pressure continued to build. “So ask.”
“I don’t need to—”
