All the girls we fuck together are obviously down for it, if they weren’t, we wouldn’t touch them, but none of them have been this eager to please us.
Would Sasha be down for this?
Would she be scared of me if she knew this is how I spent my Friday nights?
Shaking my head, I focus back on the task at hand and grip her ass like my life depends on it. It’s big and soft and everything I want right now.
Not everything.
Fuck, I need to get her out of my head. She’s not mine.
“Fuck me, Davis. Fuck me like Blair’s fucking my mouth right now,” Paisley says before Blair silences her, thrusting back into her mouth.
I slam into her, fucking her to forget about the girl I wish I was buried deep inside right now instead.
Fucking her to forget that I’ll never have the balls to go up to the little pixie who runs around campus.
Fucking her to forget those slate grey eyes that stare at me when I close mine.
It’s going to be a long fucking night.
four
SASHA
It’s been a week since Nathan and I have spoken, a week since we’ve looked each other in the eyes, and a week since I had the last remaining pieces of my heart stomped on.
He’s tried a couple of times to talk to me, but I shut him down before he could try to talk himself out of the situation.
I’ve learned very quickly that he’s a two-faced liar.
At least I don’t have to go to school with him, don’t have to pass him on campus or share a class. It’s the first time I’ve been thankful I went to Livler instead of Eastwood with my brother and ex-best friend.
When he finally realized that physically speaking to me wouldn’t do him any good, he started leaving notes on the fridge… notes I refused to read. His would be angry, words only written to make himself feel better and to shine a positive light on himself. They would be so different than the kind words left by someone unknown, words that were written solely for me, to make me feel better, to comfort me.
As angry as I am, the piece of me that misses him grows stronger every day. I miss the way we used to be, before he became a piece of shit. When I start to think that maybe we could work this out —which is stupid to begin with— I remind myself that he never stopped to think about how his actions would affect anyone else.
So now I spend my days completely alone, going to and from class, and hiding in Jurian’s room when I can’t stand the silence anymore.
I found his iPod underneath his pillow one night when I fell asleep in his bed. It was his dirty little secret, one onlyIknew of.
The stupid thing he got when we were twelve was the one thing he refused to share with anyone, he kept it hidden, using it as an escape when he needed the world to fade into the background. I bring it with me everywhere now. It’smylittle escape from the world, just like it was for him.
God, what I wouldn’t do to have a twin talk with my brother about everything going on right now. He would probably tell me that he’s proud I’m finally standing up for myself.
“Sashaaaaa,” Jurian sing-songs as he closes our front door.
I stay where I am, face-first into our slightly questionable leather couch. This thing smells like old gym socks.
He drops his keys onto the counter before walking towards me, “what the hell are you doing?”
I lift my face off the couch, just long enough to give him acoherent answer. “Don’t ask questions, just let me pout in peace.”
A heavy sigh comes from my brother a moment before I feel his fat-ass sit on me.
“Get off of me, you jerk!” I yell, my long black hair falling into my face.
He chuckles, “not until you tell me what’s going on.”
