“PleaseClaire, talk to me. What’s going on?”
I choke on my sobs, unable to get the words out. It’s too hard, I can’t sit here and tell my brother that I was raped, he’d lose it. He’d never forgive himself, even though there’s nothing he could have done to stop it.
I go to wipe a tear off of my cheek, forgetting about the bruises that cover my wrist. Chris gasps and grabs my arm to get a closer look, rage instantly clouding his eyes before he gets up and storms out of my room. “I’m going to fucking kill them” he yells.
I scramble out of the bed and chase after him, begging for him to stop and listen to me.
He suddenly stops and turns to face me, tears of his own dripping down his face, “how could Tony put you in a house with those animals? How could heeverput you in harm's way like that?”
It dawns on me that he thinks the boys did this to me, that they’re the ones who put these bruises all over my body. “Chris no, it wasn’t them. I swear.”
“You’redefendingthem?” He shakes his head and storms down the stairs, ignoring my protests. Tash comes around the corner from the kitchen and looks between the two of us like we’ve gone insane, waiting for one of us to give her some sort of an explanation.
Chris is about to leave the house when I clench my fists and snap, “I was raped at a party!” Tash’s hands fly to her face and Chris freezes in his spot.
“What?” He whispers.
More sobs wrack out of me, “I wasraped.”
He walks over to me, pulling me into the tightest hug he’s ever given me, and doesn’t let go for a very,verylong time.
* * *
Tash hands me a warm cup of tea as she takes a seat next to Chris. They both stare into nothing, processessing everything. I had to tell them, even though I still don’t know all the details myself.
“I’m so sorry Angel” Chris whispers.
I just shrug, there’s nothing him or I could have done to change the way things played out. I can’t change the past, even though I would do anything to make this all go away.
“Where is she?” I hear Steph scream as the front door slams shut.
I brace for impact as my best friend comes flying into the kitchen and wraps her arms around me, “Steph… I can’t breathe” I choke out.
“Sorry” she smiles, “I’m just so glad you’re okay.”
I wouldn’t say okay,alivemaybe, but definitely not okay.
“You need to tell her Claire” Chris says quietly, eyeing me from across the table. Steph looks between the two of us confused, trying to figure out what Chris means.
So with the little energy I have left, I tell her the same story I just told Chris and Tash. I watch my best friend fall apart just like my brother, and just like I have the past couple days.
“You need to go to the cops,” she says.
“No.”
Chris slams his fist on the table, and I have to hide the fear in my eyes when he does so, “what do you mean no? He fuckingrapedyou Claire. You need to press charges.”
I don’t think they understand, I’ve done nothing but think about what I’m supposed to do for the last five days. I’ve had nothing but time to figure out my plan… and thereisn’tone.
“You don’t get it” I say, “there’s nothing I can do. If I press charges Chris’s reputation will be ruined,myreputation will be ruined. Everyone will know that he’s my brother and everything I’ve worked for my entire life will be gone in an instant.”
Chris shakes his head, and Tash holds his hand, “you shouldn’t be worried about what will happen to me right now.”
“It’s not just about you.” There’s so many things in play right now, it’s hurting my head just thinking about it. “If I don’t win the case, I’ll be the girl who cried wolf, the girl who falsely accused the beloved hockey star of being a rapist. No one would want to work with me, I’d never be able to skate again. Not to mention I don’t have proof.”
“What do you mean no proof? You have bruises covering your body” Tash says. She sounds like she’s in disbelief.
I don’t know how to explain to them that there’s no use. No one saw what actually happened, and no one was up there to hear me screaming for help. It’s my word against his.
