I throw the wrapping for the cupcake in the garbage and head upstairs, I already know that my plans of having a chill night at home with Steph are not going to happen.
* * *
Steph heard about the party and went costume shopping literally right away. How the girl managed to get her hands on two costumes —that don’t totally suck— thedayof Halloween, I’ll never know. She forced me into a Lana Croft costume and threw a bottle of tequila in my hand, knowing it would be the only thing to shut me up. I hate that she knows me so well.
“Are you really not going to tell them?” She asks as we walk into the house.
I shrug, “what’s the point? My birthdays always go poorly one way or another so I might as well just act like it’s not happening. I love them but they’ll just try to make today special and I don’t want that.”
Steph gives me a pity smile, she knows all of this already, but it’s never stopped her from trying. Unfortunately, people just can’t understand how I feel about the matter unless they’ve gone through it themselves. She’s been lucky, her parents love her to death and always make her birthdays the best.
The guys are already here, partying it up in the corner –as usual– with beers in their hands and lazy smiles on their faces. Steph drops into August's lap the first chance she gets.
Steph and August aren’t obvious about their relationship like most people are, they act like friends most of the time. It works for them though, they aren’t throwing it in our faces or making a huge deal out of it. Both of them are low-key, and after knowing Steph for three years, I know she doesn’t like the flashy couples who suck each others faces off every chance they get.
I take a seat next to Lucas, and when he puts an arm around me, butterflies crawl their way into my stomach. It’s so weird to think that only a couple weeks ago this wouldn’t have had any effect on me… and now I’m trying not to scream at the fact that Lucas is touching me.
Steph smiles knowingly, probably doing a celebratory dance in her head while the man of her dreams traces circles on her arm. The fact that she’s always right pisses me off…
“I’m out” Lucas says, crushing an empty can in his hand, “anyone want another?”
Blair and Miller nod, and the moment I see Lucas get up, I jump at my chance. “I’ll come with you” I shout, cringing at how eager I sound. “I mean, I need a drink too, so I might as well join you.”
Great save Claire.
I follow Lucas, looking back at Steph as she gives me two thumbs up. My heart races while I search for something to talk about, anything to help myself calm down from the excitement and fear coursing through my veins.
But then I realize, I don’t need to say anything if I’m going to kiss him. No words could truly calm me down.
When we finally enter the kitchen, away from prying eyes, I grab his hand. Lucas looks back at me with nothing but kindness, staring at me expectantly. I can do this, he’s just a guy.
A guy who makes me want to do stupid things.
“What’s up pretty girl?”
My body leans in before I have the chance to talk myself out of this, and when my lips connect with his.. my whole world comes crashing to a halt. My body feels like it’s on fire, he presses up against me in the best way possible, and for a single second he melts into the kiss with me.
And then he pulls away.
His hands push me back and my heart breaks in two, the moment of bliss ripped away from me. “What the fuck was that?” he yells.
“I’m sorry I- fuck I read you completely wrong.” I want to crawl into a hole and die, this is so fucking embarrassing.
“Yeah… you did,” Lucas scoffs, storming out of the kitchen.
I don’t know how much time passes, or why I’ve been standing here completely frozen, but Idoknow that Steph reads me like a damn book the moment she sets her eyes on me.
“He rejected me” I whisper as she wraps her arms around me.
“Are you okay?”
I don’t know if I am or not. How am I supposed to feel when the guy I like reacts like that to a kiss? How am I supposed to live with him now? But even though my night is ruined, hers shouldn't be. “I will be, go have some fun” I nudge her.
“Only if you promise to try to do the same.”
She runs off, probably to find August, while I hide in the kitchen, trying not to lose my sanity. This party sucks, everyone’s too drunk, the music is too loud, and I’m less than interested in playing whatever drinking game my roommates are participating in right now.
“Wow, two times in a row we bump into one another at a bar. I’m gonna start thinking you’re an alcoholic if you aren’t careful.”
