“Yeah…” A slight grin, his breath short. “I never told this to anybody… so now you know. Maybe you’ll be the only one to know… Hell, you deserve to know.”
“But…”
“Yeah… not an option, ok? Not an option, that road. Not when I had to take over the family firm built by my grandfather, and then my dad. Being… gay… didn’t fit that agenda. It terrified me too, so… I guess I sort of talked myself out of it. Became all manly man, as they say. Football team, being the school’s cool guy, the one the girls wanted to date… you name it. And then Maddie came into the picture, and you know the rest…” Gabe watched him, speechless. That slight grin filled with darkness. “So, no… it doesn’t bother me to be around a man…” His steel eyes went to Gabe’s hazel ones. “It terrifies the living shit out of me.”
It was out, in that dark night, the flames’ shadows dancing on their faces, in their eyes, and Gabe’s heart burst in his chest as he stepped close, floating on his words. That puzzled light in his steel eyes, veiled with fear, when Gabe’s hands went to his chest.
His soft voice. “Would it be terrifying if I kissed you now?”
Damian’s lips parted, drowning in his eyes. “I guess…”
Gabe’s hands snaked up to his neck, almost choking on his words. “May I?”
Damian just nodded, and closed his eyes, his heart leaping against his chest, not even knowing what to do, even if he had done it countless times with women, that moment he’d dreamt of such a long time ago somehow here… Their lips met, and he almost fled from that touch, but Gabe held his neck gently, not letting him go, just probing, asking, and Damian opened up to him, pulling him close as his heart took over, those pushed down feelings rushing out like a gush of blood, coursing his veins as their bodies met. Opening wider as Gabe kissed him harder, emboldened by his arms around him. Their tongues meeting, Gabe’s soft moan at his taste, scorching his lips on his stubble and his teeth.More, more. Breathing him in, heavy, their breaths mingling, hard sucking sounds in that velvet night. Gabe’s arms went around his shoulders, clinging to him, feeling his hand slide down his back, stopping at his waist, but Gabe reached back and gently pushed it down to his ass. Feeling him stiffen a bit, pant into that kiss.Please…He pushed his tongue in his mouth, soft, roaming his teeth, teasing. Smiling into the kiss when he felt his hand squeeze his ass. He pressed that hard bulge in his pants against Damian’s thigh, hoping it would not be too much.Feel how I want you…and Damian stayed, didn’t move away. Losing breath, so they parted, still stuck, holding tight. Damian’s chest heaving, still somewhere in that daze.
“Still scared?”
Damian blew a breath. “More than ever…”
“We can take it slow…” Even if he was burning for him, wanting everything at that moment, it wasn’t maybe right for Damian. Remembering what he had said, too.
“Alright…”
He was still cupping his ass, so Gabe smiled and stepped out of his arms, reaching for his hand. “To bed?”
“Ok…”
Following him to their hut, to Gabe’s bedding, where he pulled him into another hungry kiss, tearing his T-shirt off, his too, his hands roaming that large back, pressing himself close until their skin met. Damian almost fainted at that touch, it felt so right, that hard body pressed against him, that firm flesh and mouth. His knees buckled and Gabe pulled him down, rolling him to the bedding. Lying on him, just to make him feel how amazing it felt, to be kissed and crushed under that weight. To make you lose your breath. Leaving his mouth, gliding down his neck. Lips, teeth, nibbling hard, down to his heaving chest, latching on his nipple. That moan rushing down his body, warm, making him pulse with desire even more. Sucking hard, not letting go, even when his hand dug into his back, kneading his meagre muscles. More. Gliding down his side, biting his ribs gently, his abs, his hipbone as he pulled his pants down, taking the boxers too with one swift move.
Meeting his wide eyes. “Still ok…?”
“Yes…”
Hesitating a breath, because what if it didn’t work… a twinge of surprise at seeing that semi-hard flesh, so he leant down, running his lips along it, just a touch, a breath, feeling it move, dizzy with his scent. He ran his fingers along that hardening flesh and velvet skin, exploring it with his mouth, his tongue, listening to his soft moans. Feeling it harden a bit more. Good. Licking, lush strokes of his tongue. He took him in his mouth, drenching him, bobbing up and down until he felt him harden even more.Lose it, come on…Sucking hard, his tongue caressing him, glancing up, holding his thighs. Jerking him off as he licked and sucked the tip, feeling him tremble, his breathing labored, soft moans. A push on his shoulder, but Gabe didn’t move, not even when he flooded his mouth. Swallowing to the last drop, he let him go, nuzzling his abs, soft kisses, his arm around his waist.
Damian lost it then, crying softly. Too much. That floodgate of suppressed emotions burst with that insane pleasure, wracking his body and soul. Feeling Gabe slide up, pull his head on his chest, holding him tight. He clutched at him, holding him close, crying into his neck. Nothing mattered anymore. His defenses and armors burst to pieces. Nothing mattered but Gabriel. Holding him in that warm night. That surreal being who had saved his life and given him a new one.
He thought he’d dreamt it, but with the dawn sun, Gabe was still there, sleeping on his shoulder, his hand on his chest, both of them naked, somehow, and Damian didn’t move, letting the sun warm up the air, that gentle morning breeze blowing it into their hut.What now? What is this?Not daring to think further than that moment when the air warmed around them, warming their skin, that soft breath on his chest, his hand on Gabe’s shoulder. That moment of golden light, so right, as if that twisted universe of his life had shifted subtly and clicked, the wheels finally turning smoothly. A rare peace. A sudden fear, that ever present fear of what he was doing at all, lying naked in the arms of another man. A dream he hadn’t dared make true. Buried under layers of lies and fake masks. A conviction there that this was somehow wrong when it only felt right. So right. The first time ever when he felt he could die right then. No remorse. In that perfect moment of bliss, life made sense more than ever.
Looking into those hazel eyes which watched him, silent. His smiling voice. “Good morning.”
“Good morning.” Hesitating with his voice, as if that man he had been could ride back on it, knock him out if this newly found bliss.
Gabe pushed himself on an elbow, his eyes like pools of gold in that morning light. “Still scared?”
“More than ever…”
“Good. I am scared too…”
He frowned but Gabe didn’t leave him time to talk, leaning down into a kiss, letting his tongue slip in his mouth, deep. His hand found his jaw, holding him softly as he ate him up. Meeting his eyes when he broke it, those steel eyes glowing with a new light.
“Breakfast? Let’s not rush this… we have all the time in the world.”
Damian just nodded, watching him get up, stretch, and pull his boxers on. He threw Damian’s to him. “Let’s go. I’m starving.”
He followed, still dazed a bit, watching him stoke the fire up, take some bananas which he’d thrown in their bamboo grill.
“All we need is coffee… but we’ll need to pretend.” Grinning, his heart flying. “So, just water. Here.”
