A soft pounding sounds on the door, and I jump. My hands fist into the sheets as I begin to shake, knowing who will be on the other side. Lucien's come for me. He's going to drag me back to that room and lock me in…or worse. And I don't know if I can survive worse right now.
"P-please," I plead to Jackson with wide eyes. I want him to hide me…or protect me, if that's even possible.
Jackson studies my reaction and frowns. "Relax. I'm sure it's just Maria."
I note that he has no fear of Lucien. I wish I could share his calm state, but I'm not able to relax until I see Maria standing on the other side of the door.
She hands Jackson a black, leather medical bag and a glass of water before quickly leaving as quickly as she came.
Jackson sets everything on top of his writing desk. Then, he opens up the split handles of the bag and roots around inside until he finds what he's looking for --- two bottles of pills. I watch him as he dispenses two pills into his palm before crossing the room.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, he holds the glass and pills out to me. "Muscle relaxer and pain pill," he explains. "They'll both make you pretty sleepy, but I'm sure you could use the rest," he says with a forlorn look.
I stare at the two white pills in his palm and frown. "Jackson, are you ---"
"Jax."
"What?"
"You can call me Jax. Jackson sounds so formal, don't you think?"
"Are you a doctor, Jax?" I ask, looking up at him.
"Yes," he answers. "Well, technically," he quickly adds. He watches me for a moment. "I can bring the bottles over if you want to read them, but I promise these won't hurt you." Then he adds, "I won't hurt you either."
I've had enough broken promises to last me a lifetime, but I decide to take Jackson at his word. Besides, the pain is becoming almost too much to bear. Snatching the pills and grabbing the glass from his hands, I down the pills with the water in a few quick swallows.
"Attagirl," Jackson says with a kind smile. He stands and strips out of his suit jacket, throwing it on the floor to add to the collection of dirty clothes in the corner of his room, and it almost makes me giggle how unlike Lucien he truly is. Then, he grabs the chair from his desk, spinning it around so the back is facing me before he sits down. "So, let's have a chat before you drift off into opioid dreamland." He sits and ponders for a moment before asking, "So what did you enjoy doing, you know, before you came here?"
I think about his question, but two things come to mind straightaway. "Well, I love books." I had a huge library at home filled with almost every book imaginable, and it was my safe haven. Most nights I would fall asleep with a book in my hand. "I also enjoy playing the piano."
His eyes light up. "Books and piano. Got it," he says as if he's storing the info away for later.
I study Jackson's handsome features and the stubble lining his strong jaw. He seems calm and…normal. His relaxed demeanor puts me at ease, but I still don't feel totally trusting of him. Mostly because he's Lucien's cousin. "When you said you're technically a doctor, what did you mean?" I ask.
"I didn't get my degree," he replies. "I quit halfway through my residency." He hangs his head sadly. "My father was sick…and it was impossible to concentrate on anything else but the cancer eating away at him. So, I made a choice," he says with a sigh. "I took care of him until he passed."
I can hear the emotion in his voice, and it makes me feel sad for him. "I'm sorry," I whisper.
His gray eyes slowly rise to meet mine. "Thank you," he says sincerely. "Anyway, I was top of my class, and I know more than most licensed practitioners." Then he adds, "I also majored in psychology while I was a pre-med student." Shifting his gaze to me, he says, "I mainly took the courses so that I could better understand Luc."
My brows furrow in confusion. I don't know much about my captor, but I know he has…issues, and that's putting it mildly. "What's wrong with him?" I blurt out.
"That's a good question," Jax says quietly. He closes his eyes and lets out a heavy sigh. "Lucien had a rough and terrible childhood. My dad found Luc and took him in when he was only a boy. We're the same age, but our relationship was bumpy, to say the least, those first few years."
"You didn't get along?" I ask, suddenly wanting to know more about Lucien's past.
"I wish that was as simple as that, but no, it was much, much worse. He was incredibly withdrawn and fearful of everything…and everyone." Jax folds his arms over the back of the chair and rests his chin on top of them. "It took some time, but my dad was eventually able to draw him out of his shell." He pauses. "If you only knew half of what I know…" His voice trails off, and I desperately want to know what he was going to say.
"What happened to him as a child?" I urge.
"I'm afraid that's his story to tell, not mine. I wouldn't betray Luc like that." He hesitates for a moment before adding, "I'll just say that if you knew what he'd been through as a boy, you would feel differently about him. You would understand why he is the way he is." He sits back in the chair. "He needs control and structure because he never had that as a child. He gained a lot of phobias and idiosyncrasies along the way even through his recovery, if you can call it that, but they are all justified, I assure you."
"How did he get the scars on his back? I felt them when we were, you know…" I can't even finish that sentence without feeling a hot blush running up my chest and neck.
"You…he let youtouchhim?" Jackson asks with a shocked expression on his handsome face.
"Yeah." My eyes drift close, but I force them back open. The pills he gave me must be kicking in. I'm certainly not as in as much pain as I was before. But I'm not ready to stop talking to Jax. I want to find out more about Lucien even if I hate him right now. For some reason, I have some sick need to understand him.
