He only hoped he could.
Reluctantly, Murphy set Nessa on her feet, looking down at the crown of her head. She craned her face up, meeting his gaze with a tenderness that nearly tore out his heart.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
“Y—“ Murphy cleared his throat before trying again. “Yeah, I’m okay.”
“You’re not the only one with scars, Murphy,” Nessa said quietly, the corner of her mouth lifting into a small, sad smile. She grabbed the hem of her shirt, fisting the material.
She hesitated for only a moment before pulling it up over her torso, revealing first the tantalizing curve of her hips, followed by her slim belly, and then her breasts.
Lust rekindled, his cock stirring to life as his eyes traced over the swells of her breasts. They were the perfect handful, and his mouth watered, his mind going blank as he reached up, cupping those soft, round globes in his palms.
He heard, more than saw, her drop her shirt onto the floor, and it took him a moment to even realize what she’d meant about her own scars.
Then he saw it; healed wounds from where Jason had clawed her and the results of the subsequent surgery afterward.
The scars began on her shoulder, traveling over her collarbone and disappearing near the top of her right breast. They were slightly lighter than her skin tone, while some parts in the middle were a muted red, which would likely fade as more time passed.
Murphy’s gut clenched at the sight, his re-emerging lust taking a back seat to his protective anger. His bear roared in his head as memories rose to the surface, taking him back to that night when he’d seen her lying prone on the ground in Tank’s home,bleeding out, that massive wolf shifter looming over her, its maw open wide, revealing sharp fangs.
“Nessa …” His hand left her breast, trailing lightly over the jagged indentations.
She shivered before squaring her shoulders, staring up at him with so much trust, his heart physically ached. “Do you think they make me look repulsive, Murphy?”
He shook his head, an instant denial. “Everything about you is beautiful.” And he meant it.
Her eyes softened. “I don’t like them. Whenever I’m in front of a mirror without my shirt on, I try to avoid looking at them.” She bit her lower lip, as if weighing what she wanted to say next. “If I’d gotten them in an accident, I think I might feel a little differently, but they’re a reminder of something horrible, and when I see them, it’s all I think about.”
“That’s how I feel, too,” he admitted gruffly. “Seeing them is painful. Not just for me, but for my family, too. That’s why I wear long sleeves.”
Nessa gasped in outrage before she sent him a lethal glare. “Did they tell you to cover them up?”
“They’ve never said anything to me, Nes,” he assured her, smiling slightly when she relaxed. It was cute how defensive she became on his behalf. Like a mama bear with her cub. The corner of his mouth twitched at the thought before he sobered. “But after it first happened, I saw the way they looked at me when they saw them. There was a lot of pity, and I didn’t want to see that, so I covered them up.”
He didn’t want to be reminded of his shortcomings, especially since he’d only just recently gained the mantle ofAlpha. He’d needed to be strong, to feign indifference to the past in order to lead his people toward a better future. He couldn’t afford to show weakness. Couldn’t afford to let himself feel it.
“Oh, Murphy.” Nessa placed her hands on his chest, her fingers digging into his sweater. “I’m sure it wasn’t pity, but empathy. Your family loves you.”
His fingers locked around her wrists, holding her hands to him. “I know they do. I’m sure back then they only wanted to help.”
They just hadn’t known how. And instead of coping with his trauma, of letting his family ease some of the hurt bottled up inside him, he’d thrown himself into being an Alpha, into making sure no one ever suffered like he did again.
It had worked, but he’d isolated himself emotionally in the process. Distanced himself from everyone but his family and a few close friends in order to prevent another catastrophe. And even then, he hadn’t let those close to him help him. To ease the weight he had placed on his own shoulders. That had lasted for over a decade.
Until his mate had entered his life, turning his world completely upside down, showing him that some things were worth the risk.
Shewas worth every risk.
Nessa watched him expectantly, waiting for him to make the next move. To lay himself bare for her scrutiny.
It’s like ripping off a Band-Aid. Just do it.
Clenching his jaw, Murphy reached over his shoulder, fisting the back of his sweater. Nessa dropped her hands from his chest, taking a small step back toward the shower as he pulled the material from his body. Cool air slid over his marred skin, causing goosebumps to trace up his arms.
He didn’t look at Nessa at first, a muscle jumping in his cheek as he waited for her to gasp in shock or to whisper his name in sympathy.
He knew what he looked like: a tapestry of disjointed lines caused from someone’s switchblade. Burn marks on randomparts of his body revealed where another human had used him as an ashtray. There were dozens of scars on his arms, torso, back, and a few smaller ones at the base of his neck.
