“How can you say that?” she asks, pulling her arm from my grip. “You’re in a relationship, or whatever you want to call it, with someone and so am I.” She has a point, and to tell the truth, even though it’s hard living with her while she’s dating Lance, the thought of not having her in my life at all would feel way worse.
“I say it because it’s how I feel,” I admit.
She pulls in a sharp breath and clears her throat, then changes the subject. “I got more milk and Lucky Charms this morning. Olive told me she ran out. I tried to explain to her that she doesn’t need to fill the bowl up to the rim since she only eats about half of it,” she says.
“Good luck with getting her to go along with that. Olive likes things in a certain way. Or else,” I laugh. “But thank you for doing that, though. You didn’t have to. I could have gotten her more cereal.”
“It’s no big deal,” Charlotte replies. “I needed a couple of things at the store anyway.”
We reach the bottom of the hill and take a seat on the bench. “Are you heading back to your job site for a bit before dinner?” Charlotte asks. “I noticed AJ has been gone since six this morning.”
“Yeah, I have to help him finish up after I grab Olive. It was a quick in and out job today.”
“Is he doing okay?” Charlotte asks, crossing her legs and leaning back into the bench.
“Yeah, I guess so. I think he’s gone on a few dates over the past month but nothing serious. He might still be bent out of shape over Alexa. I couldn’t blame him.”
“Maybe,” she agrees. “She definitely gave him good reason.”
Our conversation fizzles when the bus pulls up. “It’s today,” Olive shouts, jumping off the bus. “It’s toooodayyyy.”
“What’s today?” Charlotte asks her with a grin. I’m sure she suspects Olive’s exuberance is associated with Lana’s birthday party tonight.
Olive stops singing her words and directs her body toward me. “Oops,” she says. “I forgot.”
I wrap my arm around her and pull her in to my side, giving her a quick kiss on the top of her head.
“Oh,” Charlotte says. “Are you excited to see Ari tonight?” I’m not sure how Charlotte put two and two together so fast, but she did. I had told Olive about Ari before I asked Charlotte if it was okay to bring her to Lana’s birthday dinner tonight. I’ve wanted them to meet but Charlotte has come up with excuses each time I’ve tried to make plans. She would never admit to being jealous, especially since she’s with Lance, so I really don’t get it.
“Yeah,” Olive whispers, “but only a little. It’s just because she looks like a princess, you know.” While I know Olive was trying to downplay her uber excitement, I don’t think she realizes that she just hammered that nail in a little harder.
“Well, I can’t wait to meet this princess,” Charlotte says, playing along, giving me an indecipherable look. I scrunch my nose and shake my head, trying to tell her that Olive’s description is mildly off. Except it’s not. Ari does look like some fairytale princess. But that’s not the reason I want to be so close to her.
“We get to meet Mr. Lance tonight, too,” Lana pipes in. Okay, so I feel a little better knowing that Charlotte had already made this plan even though she just asked me if I was okay with it. It’s almost worse that she invited him over without talking to me than it was for me to invite Ari over without talking to her. It’s my house.
We’re even. I think we can just leave it at that.
“Olive, we have to go help Uncle finish a job.”
“Oh,” she says, kicking a small pile of dirt. “I thought I was going to help Charlotte cook.”
“She can stay with me,” Charlotte says while yanking Lana’s backpack off.
“Yes!” Lana shrieks, yelling so loudly her birthday crown flies off of her head and spirals into a gust of wind. I run to catch it, grabbing it mid-air. “Thank you, Hunter,” Lana shouts, running over and wrapping her arms around my leg. “You’re the best.”
Why does it feel like the four of us have turned into a family? It feels so normal, yet completely abnormal at the same time. I mean, we’re not together, yet, I could guess that we’re closer than some couples. That right there makes this weird as hell. We’re doing this all wrong.
Just to confirm my thoughts, I walk behind Charlotte and the girls, admiring the fact that Charlotte has her arms wrapped around both girls, one on each side as if they were both hers. Maybe we were just meant to find each other so we could be each other’s solid rock, the sturdiness we both desperately need in our lives right now. Could that be the reason we were meant to meet?
Once in a while I cave and let Olive stay with Charlotte after school, partially because she gets a chance to do her homework while she’s not tired, and she really enjoys the girl time with Charlotte and Lana. It has been hard letting go and making the decision to do what’s right for Olive rather than what feels right to me.
Amy—the listener, as I call her—has helped me work through my selfish traits versus what is being mixed up for my love for Olive. It turns out that someone can actually be smothered by love, even a daughter. As a dad, I’m a work in progress, I guess.
We step into the house and the girls run upstairs quickly. Charlotte is standing in front of me with a look I can’t figure out. Maybe she’s thinking what I’m thinking. “I miss you,” I want to tell her. Even though we live together, I miss her. I miss the “us” that was too short lived. It’s like our relationship continued to grow even after she ended things with me. It’s not supposed to work like that. I step up to her and wrap my arms around her neck. “You look like you need a hug today.”
“I do,” she whispers.
Driving to the job site, I pull up to the driveway, finding AJ loading up the truck with the tools. As I take only a step out of my door, he shouts, “I just finished up. I wanted to make sure we were home in time for dinner, so I turned up the AC/DC and got that shit done.”
