The baby’s head was nearly halfway out, giving me an opportunity to assist her. “Push a little harder, Leah,” I said, trying to keep hercalm.
She pushed again through a silent groan, and I guided the baby’s head out. My hands were covered in blood, but my only focus was on that innocent baby being born into the hellhole we were in. I didn't need to tell Leah to push again because she did it on her own, delivering a tiny little girl that fit snugly between my twohands.
I wrapped the baby in a kerchief I found in the corner of the room. It was dirty and torn but better than nothing, and I handed Leah her baby, watching the immediate bond between them. The outside world temporarily disappeared as she took in a moment that no one could steal from her. My only hope at that moment was that she would have a lifetime to share with herchild.
As I watched Leah and her baby, I realized I would probably never experience another moment like that. It was as close as I would ever come to experiencing the miracle of birth. However, the only miracle needed then was a way to help Leah and the baby. I had no medical supplies on me, no blankets to keep the baby warm, and no tools to cut the umbilical cord from the placenta. On top of it all, blood was still pooling from Leah, and I didn't know if that was normal. All I did know, was she needed more time in that current moment—anything life could grant her. However, without air, the baby would die, and until I cut the cord, she would have noair.
I pressed against my knees, bringing myself to my feet as I walked to the metal door, knowing I was about to reveal the crime of a hidden pregnancy. The door opened, and Charlie was waiting on the other side with a blanket and a small medical bag. “You must goquickly.”
I couldn't help the look I gave Charlie at that moment. Something within me was so moved by his compassion that it filled me with a type of emotion I had long forgotten. Seeing people wanting to help others was a dying trait among the survivors of the war. Each person was out for themselves, and all of us were pitted against each other like dogs fighting over a steakbone.
The door shut quietly behind me as I handed Leah the blanket. I rummaged through the medical bag, finding scissors to cut the cord. I cleaned Leah up with the excess material of the dress hanging below her and found her clothes across theroom.
“Let's get you dressed,” I toldher.
I helped her with her with the clothes, then held her baby girl while she secured her buttons, listening to her soft moans with each movement. The baby was unscathed, unaware of what she had been born into, and I prayed for her to findpeace.
It was a struggle to help Leah up to her feet, but as I did, we bundled the baby up inside the smocked dress, and I carefully led her through the back exit. “You must go to your block, hide there, feed your baby, and do whatever you can to keep her safe andquiet.”
Tears ran down Leah's pale skin as she leaned forward and kissed me on the cheek. “I will never forget you,” she said. “You are agift.”
“No more tears,” I reminded her. “We can’t show our weakness,remember?”
She sniffled and offered a faint smile before shuffling off behind thebarracks.
I reopened the metal door, finding Charlie still standing guard. “She and the baby are okay,” I whispered. “I sent her to herblock.”
Charlie looked at me with a dark stare. “They’re going to kill them when they find her,” hesaid.
Without replying to his statement, I swallowed hard, pushing away the thought—the truth. “I’m leaving,” I toldhim.
“Amelia, youcan’t.”
“I’m making a run for it,” I told himagain.
“How many times have we talked aboutthis?”
“I think I can do it,” Iargued.
“No, Amelia.No.”
I stared at him so hard I thought maybe I'd be able to see a hidden motive within his eyes, but instead, all I saw was the unmistakable worry in the creases of hisforehead.
Charlie closed us back inside the shower room and placed his hands on my shoulders. “Amelia, no one has managed to escape. Not one person in over ayear.”
“Why can’t I be thefirst?”
“Because if you’re not successful, you’ll be executed like theothers.”
I shrugged since I didn't care much anymore. The difference between death and the state I was living in couldn't have been too different. In fact, I imagined heaven to be a very peaceful place in comparison. “Charlie, I don’t care if I dietrying.”
“I do,” he said, sternly, through his clenchedjaw.
“We’re friends,” I told him. “You have fed me as I’ve needed food, you’ve made me smile when I shouldn’t be capable of such an expression, and you have made me feel less alone, but you're going to walk away, and I’mnot.”
“You don’t know that,” heargued.
A gentle smile pressed against my lips. “In my heart, I know I’m the only person who can savemyself.”
