War is coming. I don’t know when, but I’ve seen it. And I’ve seen myself in the middle of it, ripping apart minds until their owners are nothing but thoughtless husks. I cannot be that. I cannot use Loria’s blood to destroy what she made.
Colden shakes his head, still disbelieving in the war I feel the Northlands will eventually face, regardless of his treaty with the East.
“Well, there’s no changing your mind then?” he asks. “Even after…”
I look at them as his voice trails, my heart breaking, and close the small distance between us. With all the love I possess for them, I press my hands to their faces.
In that instant, with our barriers finally down, images flicker through my mind. I see Alexus with a beautiful, dark-haired woman donned in warrior’s armor, staring at her fierce face as though she is the universe itself. And I see Colden, clasping the face of a handsome man with hair like a raven’s feathers, looking into his eyes with so much love and longing it takes my breath away.
“No,” I whisper, my tears finally falling. “These last nights with you were the greatest gift. I will carry those memories with me always. But we have different paths. We must go and find them.” I lower my hands and glance around the cottage. “My new path begins here.”
Alexus steps close, tightens his hand at my waist, and draws me in for a kiss. He wants to want me the way I long for him to. Wants to love me enough that he would fight me before leaving me here alone. That’s the kind of love he will give the dark-haired woman.
The kind that allows no divide.
When he releases me, Colden takes his place, tugging me into an embrace. “We might be weeks away, and I know you don’t like to do it, but you’re welcome to speak into my mind any time. If you need us, all you have to do is call to me, and I will be here.”
I pull back and cup his face again, a smile managing to form on my lips. “I know,” is all I say. NotI will, because I won’t. I just can’t.
They stay for a while and help unpack my belongings. Alexus inspects every part of the cottage to make certain no repairs are needed, and Colden ices over a few tiny gaps in the stones from the outside, sealing off any chance of a draft. They check the firewood and the village food stores.
Salted fish.I’m going to be eating a lot of salted fish.
That afternoon, they finally gather their horses to leave. Standing in the bitter cold, they each hold my hands and look into my eyes as the villagers watch us with curious stares. No more kisses are shared. No more pleas for me to return with them are made. Alexus simply brushes his thumb across my cheek, his eyes glassy, and Colden squeezes my hand.
“You have a piece of my heart, princess,” he says. “Always.”
“And you, mine, my king.”
Sadness fills his eyes, enough that he rips his teary gaze away and mounts his horse. Alexus nods at me one last time and swings up onto his animal.
The pain that lances my heart as I watch them ride across the white plains and vanish is the most brutal wound Loria’s gift has ever brought upon me. Because if I’d just been born a normal girl, I could’ve been with them the way I desire, blissfully ignorant of futures I have the power to change.
In my cottage, I sit by the fire for a long time, absorbing the silence that will become my closest confidant. Alone, I stare out the single, small window, crying with an aching heart as I watch the falling night descend.
There truly is no darkness so great as a night sky over the Iceland Plains midwinter. Except the darkness I foresaw in my heart. The darkness that made me choose this life over one at Winterhold.
I can only pray to the Ancient Ones I made the right decision.
Paramour
Colden & Nephele’s First Time
Three Years After Nephele’s Collection
1
NEPHELE
“Pleeeeease? You’re making me beg for something I shouldn’t have to beg for.”
Colden glances up from his book. He’s lying in bed, already undressed, and tucked under the covers for the evening, as though it isn’t barely after dark on my favorite night of the year here at Winterhold: the Midsummer Festival.
He drags his hand from beneath the covers and arches a brow, skimming his dark gaze over my red gown. His attention lingers for the briefest moment on the small swell of my breasts peeking from the scooped neckline before quickly slipping back to my face.
“I’m sure you’ll catch the eye of some lucky lad tonight, especially wearingthat. You don’t need me tagging along, spoiling your chances.”
As if I’m looking for a lover tonight. I can’t say I’d be against it, but no one in the village has captivated me enough that I would willingly let them take what I have to give. Except for the king lying before me, and he isn’t the slightest bit interested.
