“I’m already in bed. I’ve got my Coulter F1 Racingpyjamas on.” A flush replaces the panic that’s been like a vice across my chest. “I’ll talk to you until you’re in your car. Is that okay?”
“That’s perfect. You had problems with your mum and Tabi tonight?”
“Yeah. My mum cares about me, but her expectations are hard to manage. You know?”
“I do. You’ve met my dad, remember?”
“Parents.” She sighs, and the image of Connor’s trainer holding my helmet is replaced with a sighing Rosie in bed wearing pyjamas with my family name on them. My name. “But I’ll tell you about my mum another time. No one needs that when they’re already anxious.”
I smile despite everything I’ve been through today. “I’m nearly at my car now, so you can stand down, World’s Best Assistant.”
“My praise kink thanks you for that.”
A tickle hits my throat, and I clear it noisily. “I’ll get stickers designed with that slogan and cover your desk in them.”
She giggles. “You’ll make the other assistants jealous.”
“Good. Everyone should be jealous of you.”
“I do have the best boss, even if he’s a grumpy arse sometimes,” she teases.
I lean against my car. I don’t want to say goodbye, but as incredible as Rosie is, she’s no replacement for a professional therapist, and I wouldn’t want to put all my anxiety on her.
“Before I go, tell me how I can help you return to the track tomorrow. You need to be in control, so I want to help you with that.”
I suck in a breath. Images of controlling Rosie while I tell her she’s my good girl aren’t for sharing. I’ve always been a fan of power play in the bedroom, but I expect if I got close to anyone again, my need for control would be acerbated. Theseideas about Rosie must be a reaction to the adrenaline rollercoaster I’m riding.
I clear my throat. “Thank you. I’ll message you before I leave for the track tomorrow. If you can talk, call me back.”
“Okay. And sir?”
My pulse races. I like that name too much. “Yes, Rosie?”
“Think about what you need me to do to help you regain control while I sleep. Whatever it is, I’m willing and ready. I’ll do whatever you want me to.”
“Anything?” I gulp.
“Anything,” she repeats, her voice low with promise.
“I’ll keep that in mind. Goodnight, Rosabella,” I reply, my voice deeper than the fantasies I’m now falling into.
CHAPTER 25
Rosie
I’ve spent the last days face-palming every time I remember what I said to Niki. Thankfully, he’s not mentioned it. Why did I keep calling him sir and offer to help him regain control?
I nibble my lips. I know why I said it. I was wearing the retro Niki Coulter T-shirt to bed. It was like I was branded with his name while speaking to him. Knowing I’d helped ease his anxiety made me feel powerful, and I wanted him to feel the same. And I was wired because the T-shirt was the same colour as the underwear I’d worn when I dived into the ocean with him.
He returned from Japan with a smile and a bag of presents, including a watercolour painting for me and a husky plushie for Tabi.
We’ve got a couple of weeks until the next race, so I’m finally implementing my secret plan.
I’ve cleared his calendar and filled the afternoon with a meeting under the subject, “Future planning.”
I’m so giddy that when I walk into his officeand see him in a suit and tie due to his meeting with investors earlier that morning, I shout, “I need you to strip.”
His eyes widen, and I cover my giggling mouth. “That came out wrong.”
