“What I do know is, you just got my pussy wet as fuck talking to me like that. I respect myself, and that’s why I’m trying to fuck with you. I know everything I need to know about you, but what you need to know is that all I want is the dick! I want you to use me and fuck all yo’ problems away. I don’t want nothing more than for you to beat my shit like it stole something,” she said, causing the blunt to slip from my lips and my mouth to fall open.
Never in my life had I met a hoe who came straight out with it like that. I liked that shit too, but I kept telling myself that I wasn’t about to cheat on my girl. As bad as I wanted to go home and comfort her, I couldn’t take the sight of her all stressed out. As I thought of Moni, this chick slid her hand to the crotch of my shorts and started massaging my balls through my shorts. I grabbed her hand tightly and looked her in the eyes, letting her know she had crossed the line.
She chuckled loudly, then she leaned up and licked my ear. My mans instantly stood up in my shorts. That threw me off and made me drop her hand. As soon as I did that, she put her hand completely into my shorts and continued licking my ear. In my mind, I was telling myself to push this bitch off of me, but for some reason, I couldn’t muster up the strength to really do it.
One thing led to another, and we went from touching in the car to me pushing her head into the pillow and breaking her back in at her crib. Her pussy was just regular, and it left anigga feeling guilty as fuck afterward. I didn’t even know this chick, and I allowed myself to fuck up big time like that. When we were done, and I went to flush the rubber, it had a leak in it. Since I had been bustin’ her down so hard, I guessed I had put a hole in the condom. I prayed for the best and went on about my business. Something in my mind said to get her a Plan B, just to be safe, but I really just wanted to never see her again. It’s like, as soon as the shit was over, guilt immediately started eating me up. I was in a vulnerable state, or else this basic ass bitch would have never been able to manipulate me into giving her the dick.
After that crazy shit happened, I went home and waited on my girl hand and foot. I stayed by her side for months straight, until I could see the change and knew she was doing better. We went to church together nearly every Sunday, and I just tried to be the best nigga that I could for her. Whenever my back was against the wall, she always had a nigga’s back, so I had to do the same for her. I regretted what I did every day, and no matter how much I tried to forget it happened, I had a nagging feeling that wouldn’t go away.
They say that when you try to live right, the devil always wants to pop his bitch ass up, and that is the truth. Diamond started reaching out through social media, and every time I saw her name, I would hurry and block her ass. It was just a one-time thing, but she couldn’t understand that. For a couple of months, I had done good at ignoring the chick until I stopped by one of my traps in the hood to get them niggas straight, and she popped up on me as I was walking out.
I was in a rush because I had to take my girl to her spa appointment, which I was trying to surprise her with. I took a deep breath before walking to my car that she was leaning on.
“What’s good, ma?” Are you following me around now?” I asked in an annoyed tone.
“You tell me what’s good! You moving real funny, blocking me and shit when I only reached out to tell you something important.”
“What could you possibly have to tell me? What happened was a mistake that won’t ever happen again. You know I got a girl, so reaching out to me at all is doing too much. You being here is doing too much. I appreciate you for trying to get a nigga’s mind off shit that night, but you have to let that go. It’s done.”
“See, that’s where you wrong. It’s not done, and you’ll never be able to ask me to just leave you alone because I have something that belongs to you,” she said as she handed me a stack of papers.
I scrunched up my face and stared at her for a minute before snatching the papers from her hand. The paper on top had proof of pregnancy and gestation date on it. The paper was dated three weeks back, and it stated that she was four weeks pregnant then. I started doing the math in my head, and then a nigga started feeling sick to my stomach. The rubber was leaking that night, and the time added up. I didn’t know what kind of person this chick was or if she was a thot in these streets—all I knew was that I couldn’t have no child with this hoe. I flipped through the pages with information about how to care for herself during the pregnancy. I flipped to the last page, and it was an ultrasound. When I saw that shit, I got a feeling that I couldn’t explain. It was like I knew her baby was mine, and it wasn’t even formed yet.
“Congrats on that, but move from in front of my whip. I gotta dip,” I said as I passed her the paperwork back and gently moved her to the side and out of my fuckin way.
“Please don’t make me show my ass. The reason I’m here telling you I’m pregnant is because it’s your baby, dude. I haven’t been messing around with anyone else, period. Youknow that rubber burst. I felt it when it happened. You can be there willingly, or I will get it out of you another way,” she sternly stated.
I knew by the way she just threw that last statement out there that she was about to be a problem.
“What’s yo’ number, mane? I’ll have to catch you later because, like I said, I have somewhere to be,” I told her as I pulled my phone out so I could save her number.
She ran her number off to me, then she walked over to her Honda and got in before I got into my car. I shook my head at the thought of having to deal with a hood-rat like that. This shit couldn’t be real. My life couldn’t be this messed up. Just as I thought my girl and I were getting over something so traumatic, here comes this bad luck ass bitch. I regretted smashing her from the second I slid into her dry ass. I knew I had to figure out if the child was mine or not, then I would move accordingly. All I could do now was pray that Moni never found out about any of this.
I let a whole month pass before I called Diamond. I didn’t wanna do it, but as a man, I knew I needed to know the truth and be responsible if the child was mine. I called her, and she instantly answered on the first ring.
“Hello?”
“Wassup, ma? Everything good wit cha?”
“Yes, I’m good, headed to my appointment. If you call me back later, I’ll tell you how it went,” she said in a rush.
“Wait a minute! Where is your appointment at?” I asked.
She paused for a minute before telling me and giving me the address. I told her that I would pull up. Something in me was happy about having a second chance at being a father, but the part that fucked me up was that it wasn’t by my girl. I didn’t want to ever hurt her, but I couldn’t have my seed out here doing bad if it turned out to be mine. I was raiseddifferently. Regardless of my mistakes, I was always gon’ stand on business like a man and own up to my shit.
I never fucked with Diamond again after that, but I was there for her entire pregnancy. The man in me wouldn’t allow me to neglect what was possibly my responsibility. Having to hide shit from my girl was eating me up inside, but I feared her knowing more than I feared anything else. Harmoni would have never accepted this shit, even if it was a one time mistake. We lost our son, now I was having one with someone else.
When my son was born, I didn’t need a DNA test because he was my twin, but I still got one to ease my mind. I paid Diamond monthly, so she wouldn’t have to go through that child support bullshit and put them people in my business. The fifteen hundred I gave her a month was way more than enough for her lifestyle.
I would visit my son twice a week, and I always called before I came, so she wouldn’t get the wrong idea. I kept things strictly about my son, and I hated having to look Harmoni in the eyes, knowing I had been out there doing her wrong. When Harmoni’s last lease was up, I made sure she knew I wasn’t moving into the new house with her. I paid for everything, but I just couldn’t keep facing her like that. The death of our son was still fresh, so she said she understood. I still treated her like a queen and gave her all the time I could because I loved her, but she no longer had my whole heart. The other half belonged to my son, and I was gonna do whatever I had to do so she wouldn’t find out.
Now, the cat was out of the bag, and I’d lost my girl. If I didn’t hate shit else in this world, now, I hated Diamond bitch ass.
Iwoke up to a text from my best friend telling me that she would be over to scoop me up for a girl’s day at around noon. She said she wasn’t taking no for an answer, and I wasn’t going to fight with her about it either. I was done being cooped up in the house, hiding from the world, all because my trifling ass ex decided to play me. I had cried long enough, and I wasn’t about to keep doing that shit. I needed to get back to my old self, so I was going to take all the steps necessary. Yeah, I was hurt. Who wouldn’t be? The man I gave years to had betrayed me in the worst way. That little boy was the splitting image of him. And he’d hid the kid for years.
I pulled my hair up into a messy bun, put some Shea butter on my face and arms, threw on some lashes and lip gloss, then I was ready to go. I had on my sun dress and a pair of Chanelslides because the sun was out, and I was looking for a new sponsor. The last nigga had officially struck out, and that was his bad. I was still hurt, but I wasn’t broken. It was Jakari’s loss, not mine. I held him down in every aspect. I would have even put my freedom on the line, so he didn’t have to risk his, but he showed his appreciation by messing around on me and having a baby. I tell ya ’bout niggas these days.
When my bestie Ciara showed up, our first stop was the Galleria mall. I couldn’t lie like I didn’t need to blow a bag to make me feel better, but it was going to be Jakari’s card that I swiped because that nigga owed me.???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
