Ellie rolled her eyes. “Then you ain’t got nothing to worry about, have you, babes?”
“The boys are saying you kissed him!” Cristina cried.
Indira’s voice crackled in my headset. “What the fuck is he doing? He’s ruiningeverything!”
I looked up, chest tightening in panic, and my eyes landed on him. You couldn’t miss him. Of course it washim. Riding his horse directly through the back of our shot—shirtless, round arse bouncing rhythmically, erotically, up and down in the saddle. Instantly, I understood why the “horsey girls” at school had been so obsessed with their weekend pony clubs.
“Holy shit,” Ridhi said, pointing at William, tears suddenly forgotten. “Girls, cop a look at that. It’s straight out of a Jilly Cooper.”
Ellie and Cristina turned in unison.
“You must be joking me,” Ellie said, eyes glazing.
Cristina fanned herself with her hand. “Who the hell is that?”
We all watched, captivated, as William’s wide back and firm buttocks bounced out of view behind the stables. Indira screeched something into my ear, shaking me back to life. I banged my hand against my clipboard to get the women’s attention.
Ellie turned around, thumb pointing back over her shoulder, eyes hopeful. “Is he for us?”
“No, he’s the guy who owns this place.” As soon as the words left my mouth, I knew I’d messed up. “He’s completely out of bounds!”
“He’sLord Buckford?” Cristina’s razor-thin eyebrows were waging a losing battle with the Botox in her forehead.
“Come on, let’s focus,” I said. “We’re all here to talk about Lord Armando, remember?”
Ridhi looked at me like I was an idiot. “Who cares about that badmash when there’s a real-life lord right there.”
“And he looks like that!” Cristina added.
Ellie was shaking her head. “I ain’t never been jealous of a horse before. He can bounce up and down like that on me anytime.”
My headset crackled, and Indira’s voice came through in my ear. “Reset. Remind Ridhi we’ve got Armando on camera saying he’s falling in love with her. Find a way to quietly slip it to Cristina we got the kiss on film. That should get us back to where we need to be. You’re on your own for five while I go ask Baron Fuckwad whether he’s been kicked in the head by a horse or if he’s really that fucking stupid.”
“Letmego,” I said. It burst out of me so quickly I surprised myself. But not only was this an opportunity to show Indira I could handle any situation the job demanded, it was also a chance to regain some semblance of professionalism with William.
“We’ll finish this scene and I’ll go have a word with him,” I said. “You’ve got enough on your plate.”
Half an hour later I was marching towards the stables, clipboard in hand, headset hooked into my belt, going over in my head what I was going to say when I found Lord Liability. The crunch of the gravel under my trainers sounded satisfyingly aggressive. The air was thick with the earthy stench of farmyard. A loud neigh echoed out from the stables. Several other horses joined in. Then I thought I heard William’s voice. I made a beeline for an open pair of barn-style doors, ready to give him a piece of my mind. I was still a good ten metres from the building when I decided to fire the starting gun on my rage nice and early, so he’d know he was in trouble.
“Lord Buckford,” I called out, sounding fierce.
“Lord Buckford again, is it?” he called back, although I still couldn’t see him.
Then, suddenly, Icouldsee him. William emerged from the darkness, through the barn doors and into the bright midday sun. He strode towards me, still shirtless, wearing only cream jodhpurs, knee-high black riding boots, and a pair of brown leather gardening gloves. Sweat trickled down the side of his face, his neck, and the line of his chest. A gold chain around his neck sparkled in the sun. He was so…wide.
“What happened to William?” he said. He had straw in his hair, dirt smeared across his chest.
“Mate, do you have any idea what you’ve done?” I managed to bark.
He shook his head, grimaced, and wiped his brow with his forearm. How was I meant to work in these conditions? I was here to give this guy a professional ticking off and all I wanted to do was lap at his armpits like a Labrador at its dinner bowl. I had to remember why I was here. Not at the stables, but why I was at Buckford Hall at all.
“I’ve been staying out of everyone’s way, as requested,” William said, turning towards a haystack and sliding his gloved hands under the strings of a bale. “I haven’t had any contact with anybody since Jonty came to the folly. Whatever’s happened now, I’m not to blame.”
He lifted the bale of hay, rested it against a powerful thigh, and disappeared back into the stables with it. I had no choice but to follow—if only so I could keep watching the way the cotton of his jodhpurs clung to his arse like it was polishing a pair of bowling balls. I made a mental note to brainstorm reality TV show ideas centred around horses and stables.The Riding School?Celebrity Riding School, perhaps?
“Watch your step,” William said, giving me barely enough time to skip around a massive pile of horse poo.
“You ruined a really important scene.”
