She dared to meet his gaze. His eyes hadn’t changed. It was the same Sam who had made love to her all those years ago.
He must have taken her silence for doubt as he said, ‘I came to seeyou.’ He cupped her jawline with his hands. ‘I’ve thought about you for years. Have you thought about me?’
Every day. Every night.‘Yes, often.’
‘I had no idea if you had survived. I came to see if you are all right.’
His warmth left her skin as his hands fell away. ‘I’m all right.’
She found herself swaying towards him, desperately craving the feel of his body against hers. As if he felt it too, he finally wrapped his arms about her and drew her close. She rested her cheek against him and they fell silent so only their breathing whispered in unison.What does this visit mean? Is he really just here to see if I am all right? Is it simply to keep his promise, and soon he will be walking away?
‘I felt so guilty for leaving you, knowing our army was advancing.’
Her heart sank lower that it might be only guilt bringing him to her. ‘We could do little else. We were on different sides.’
‘There are no sides now,’ he murmured. ‘Not between us.’
‘You don’t need to feel any guilt,’ she told him. ‘I am well. We are well.’
He stretched a space between them and looked down into her face. ‘It would make things simpler if it was just guilt.’
‘It has never been simple between us, Sam.’
His gaze drifted from hers and to the half-open door of her bedroom. ‘No. It might never be simple.’ The shadow of sadness crossed his face. ‘You still go by the name Kalbach. I didn’t think you were married.’
She followed his gaze. Miriam’s fold-out bed lay next to a double bed. The creases in the second set of pillows showed she sometimes shared her bed.
‘I’m not.’
‘But you sleep with someone.’
She broke away. ‘Don’t jump to conclusions.’
‘I’m sorry. I just hoped nothing had changed.’
‘You appear out of nowhere and want everything to be how it was. Well, it isn’t. It can never be the same.’
‘That’s not what I want. I want more.’ Suddenly his touch was framing her face again. ‘I want this.’ His lips touched hers, instantly setting free the doubts that she had harboured for so long that perhaps his kisses had not been so perfect as she liked to recall. Shockingly intimate, but as pleasurable and natural as a woman could yearn for. The intensity and thrill were all the more startling because she hadn’t been kissed for almost six years. The familiar sensations of warmth swirled inside her and she wanted to sigh with the joy of it all. Only Sam had ever evoked the sort of feelings that could rob her of her breath. Shefound herself weeping tears of relief that he had found her and reminded her that she had not lost the ability to feel more than maternal instinct. Lately she had begun to fear that her own femininity was somehow broken and that she was hollow inside — with no prospect of feeling anything of consequence again.
He didn’t notice the tears running down her cheeks until they touched his fingers. He pulled away and stared at them.
He frowned with concern. ‘Why are you crying, Elsa?’
She didn’t want doubt to snake its way into their lives and spoil what had just occurred. She had only just cast it out. She brushed her tears away with a hurried swipe of her hand, but he grasped it mid-air and brought it to his lips. He kissed her tears that lay in her open fingers then gently pulled her closer to kiss those that remained near her eyes. She shuddered with relief at his touch, then reached for his hand and silently led him to the bedroom.
The hour that followed was just for them. Outside, the Earth still turned, time continued to tick and Hamburg and its people continued their relentless attempt to rebuild and finally remove the cloud of rubble dust that was never rinsed away by the rain. Inside her basic rooms, their world consisted of just the two of them, and they grasped and welcomed this precious opportunity before their time together was snatched away. And it would end, she reminded herself. He would come to his senses and return to England without her. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but it would happen. She had been the enemy, and what old soldier would want that?
However, as he kissed and stroked her naked body and she explored his, she could, for the next hour, fool herself that things might be different. After all, he appeared to feel the same intense need to be close to her as she did him.
Eventually, they fell exhausted to lie side by side and share a smile, confident that their exquisite lovemaking would be forever locked away in their memories and would always bring comfort in the future.
* * *
‘Don’t give up your dream on becoming a vet, Sam. You would make a good one.’
‘I’ve always wanted to be one. Maybe. Do you like being a translator?’
They were lying on their backs, looking at the stained ceiling, trying to keep the outside world at bay, but knowing it was impossible. Each time they spoke, the reality of their lives seeped in word by word, question by question, thought by thought.
