‘Yep, Stuart and Steve.’ Her eyes soften at the mention of their names. ‘I’m lucky in so many ways. I dread to think what would have happened if she hadn’t handed me over to them. She couldn’t take care of a cat, let alone a baby. The only time she spent any time with me, I almost drowned.’
No wonder she never learnt to swim.
‘What happened?’ My hand hovers over hers where she clings white-knuckled to the ledge of the deep end.
‘I was four years old. It was a beautiful summer’s day. She convinced my dads to let her take me for the day, and that she wanted to spend some time with me. We took a train to the countryside. She took me to a lake with a picnic area. It’s a gorgeous spot in Meath, with a waterfall and everything.’
I know the spot. I’ve been a couple of times. It’s secluded and stunning.
She continues, staring blankly ahead like she’s seeing it play out in her mind. ‘We packed a picnic. Took bathing suits. I remember feeling so special, so wanted. I was at the age where I was beginning to realise most people had a motherand a father, and I was so happy that mine had finally come back for me.
‘She took a million pictures of us with one of those Polaroid cameras, probably for the child benefit I later found out she was claiming, then drank a bottle of wine she’d packed and fell asleep in the sun. I was so disappointed that I’d waited to spend time with her, and instead of playing with me she fell asleep, pissed.’
I nod sympathetically but don’t interrupt her flow.
Savannah swallows thickly. ‘I went into the water on my own. It looked so inviting, but it was deeper than I thought. I got into difficulty, but when I screamed for help, she was in a Chianti coma and wouldn’t wake up. There was nobody else around, and I was petrified. I thought I was going to drown until a dog-walker heard the commotion and pulled me out of the water.
‘My dads collected me from the train station and that was the last time I saw my mother.’ She arches her eyebrows and shrugs.
‘I’m so sorry, Sav.’ I squeeze her hand, but there’s nothing sexual about it.
‘It’s not something many people know,’ she confesses. ‘I’d hate them to pity me.’
‘I don’t pity you, Savannah. I pity your mother. Look what she lost.’
Savannah flinches. She puts on a brave face, but I bet it still rips her apart that her mother abandoned her, especially now she’s a mother herself.
‘This hot mess?’ She motions to her make-up free face and forces a smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes.
I sweep a hand across her face. ‘You’re amazing.’
‘You know you’re not too bad yourself.’ Her lips lift into a rare smile. ‘For a cocky manwhore.’
Chapter Nineteen
SAVANNAH
I’m obsessed with you. I’m obsessed with you.
It’s been playing in a loop around and around my mind for a full week.
If I was smart, I’d forget about it, but I can’t.
I thought Ronan might have called but I’ve heard nothing, apart from a text saying he can squeeze the girls in for a lesson at eleven am.
Then again, he is a manwhore, so what did I expect?
I didn’t even get him off, or tell him to get himself off while I watched, something I’ve regretted a million times this week.
What was I thinking?
Clearly, I wasn’t.
I shove the girls’ bag into the changing room lockers and head out to the pool to take my seat for the weekly perving session – oops, I mean swimming lesson.
Ronan greets the girls enthusiastically, taking Eden’s hands to help her into the water, but his navy eyes are locked on me. There’s a chemistry in the air and not just the clawing smell of chlorine from the pool
Those full, plump lips.
