‘No blow job with that?’ It’s out of my mouth before I can help it. That’s what happens when you’re raised by Penny and Frank ‘zero-boundaries’ Jackson. My parents would be so proud of me.
He pauses for a beat. ‘Are you offering? Because it’s been a while. I can send a car for you in ten minutes if that’s the case.’ I swear there’s a hint of a smirk in that tone.
‘We’re not that kind of agency. Careful, or you could get sued for harassment.’ I bite my lip; grateful he can’t see the blush flashing across my cheeks.
‘Given your initial remark, you wouldn't have a leg to stand on.’ His voice oozes certainty.
‘I might, if I had a decent lawyer.’ What am I playing at?
Seriously, am I flirting with the one of the strangest, most surly clients I’ve ever encountered?
This is what happens when I avoid men for the best part of a year. Though, that voice might be sullen but there’s a sublimely sexy edge to it. The man could audition as an audiobook narrator. I’d listen to War and Peace in Russian just to have that rich smooth tone slide into my ear and straight over every notch of my spine.
‘Iama decent lawyer and I doubt even I could help you.’
‘You know what, Mr Hot Shot Lawyer, maybe youcanhelp me.’ The idea I’ve been subconsciously toying with spurts like a volcano. ‘Just not in a courtroom.’
‘And here was me thinking I paid a hefty sign-up fee for you to help me …’ He muses.
‘Perhaps we can help each other.’ I nip the inside of my cheek, trying to articulate the right words. ‘From your registration form, I gather you’re not actually looking for a love match, is that correct?’
‘There’s no such thing.’ He says it with such certainty, if I didn’t know better, I might even believe him.
‘Well, given your chosen profession, I suppose I can understand why you might think that but—’
He cuts me off before I can finish. ‘It’s a fact, but givenyourchosen profession, I suppose we’ll have to agree to disagree.’
Someone’s clearly done a number on him. It has to be the cheating ex he’s trying to get rid of.
‘Mr Callaghan, please hear me out.’ I pick up the pen that’s lying on my desk and draw tiny hearts on the wad of pink Post-It notes in front of me. My new client might not be a hopeless romantic, but it looks like I still am, despite this year’s abstinence. ‘Given the way you answered the questionnaire, it would be utterly unprofessional and detrimental to even consider matching you with anyone in HeartSync’s database. We join hearts, not break them. Given you’re clearly not looking for love, it’s a recipe for disaster.’
‘So, you’re ringing to issue me a refund?’ That voice. It’s liquid gold. So rich. So smooth.
‘I’m ringing you to offer a different solution. I wasn't joking when I said perhaps, we could help each other.’ Especially if you look even a fraction as sexy as you sound.
‘Go on.’ His voice piques slightly.
‘I find myself in a similar situation to you.’ I confess, cradling the phone against my shoulder.
A tutting sound follows. ‘You have a cheating ex who’s hanging round like a bad smell, trying to get into your pants while simultaneously wrecking any bit of routine you put in place for your six-year-old daughter?’
Wow. No wonder the man is a cynic when it comes to relationships.
‘Not exactly.’ I stare down at the hearts I’ve drawn on the Post-It notes and am surprised to see I’ve scrawled the name Cillian in the centre. I tear it off and toss it into the wastebasket tucked beneath my desk. ‘It seems to me that you could benefit from a fake-girlfriend. And I find myself in need of a date for several events in December …’ I trail off and wait as my suggestion settles in.
Deep even breaths tickling my ear are the only reassurance that he hasn’t hung up on me.
This is madness.
I should hang up.
‘You own a dating agency, but you need a fake boyfriend?’ He snorts. ‘I’m not sure if that’s tragic, amusing, or if I should demand a refund after all.’
And that right there is precisely my problem. He’s right. I’m a lost cause. This is a lost cause.
‘It was a stupid suggestion. Inappropriate too.’ I blow out a huge lungful of air, deflating both physically and emotionally in unison. ‘I’ll issue your refund immediately.’
‘Don’t you dare.’ A low growl follows. ‘You, Ava Jackson, might be the only woman who can help me.’
