‘I’d love to do it, but I can’t imagine for one minute they’d think I was suitable. However, my sister and her husband have a fabulous home for a child.’ My gaze meets Andie’s. She’s leaning against the kitchen doorway, not even bothering to pretend she’s not eavesdropping.
I shoot her a silent plea with my eyes.
She mouths, ‘What the fuck?’ At least it’s not a straight no.
‘I might be able to fabricate some sort of distant relative claim to Lily-May if you send me on enough paperwork,’ Declan says. ‘Passports, birth certificates. Give me everything you’ve got, and I’ll do the rest.’
What am I doing? Taking on a child I’ve met only a handful of times. One who wants to be with Victoria as much as I do.
At least we have that in common.
I know nothing about raising kids.
Am I trying to impress Victoria? Or is it because I want a second chance at protecting someone I care about, even if it is a four-and-a-half-foot hellraiser?
I honestly don’t know.
But I do know I can’t abandon her. She’s clearly not happy where she is.
‘Give me an hour to reach civilisation and a fax machine,’ I say.
‘You’ll want to get some sort of wi-fi network booster if you’re planning on staying down there in the sticks,’ Declan advises.
‘I like being off grid,’ I admit.
‘Isn’t it lonely?’
‘It might not be for much longer.’ Oh God, what am I doing?
The sound of his chuckle drifts through the receiver before he hangs up.
Andie stalks across the room. ‘You can’t seriously be thinking about adopting a child?’
‘Deadly serious. Well, foster at first.’
‘What the actual fuck, Archie?’ Her hands rise in an exasperated gesture.
‘Victoria and I had decided we wanted to try to help Lily-May before… beforethatnight.’
When I arrived here, pale-faced and broken-hearted, Andie coaxed the whole sorry story out of me, minus the part where Victoria and I had discussed trying to foster Lily-May together.
‘So you want to honour your word to Victoria?’ Andie asks.
Do I? Is that what this is?
‘In some ways, yes, but it’s so much more than that. Lily-May’s mother died in the hospital on Victoria’s shift. We forged a bond with her. Both of us saw ourselves in her. When Mum died, I had you. When Victoria’s parents died, she had her sisters. But Lily-May has no one. I had hoped she’d find a nice family, given Victoria and I obviously couldn’t take her on anymore, but she hasn’t, Andie. I can’t leave her there, knowing she’s miserable.’
‘Archie, we’re talking about adopting a child. Or fostering, at least.’ She blows out a long, slow breath. ‘A child who’s going to need stability, security and love. If you do this, there’s no going back. It’s a bigger commitment than marriage. You can’t divorce a child.’
‘I know. But I can give her what she needs. Security. Stability. A family, if you don’t mind being part of this.’
I made a lot of mistakes in my life which I can’t fix, but I can do as much good for others as possible to make up for it.
Andie flips a tea towel over her shoulder and stretches her hands out towards me. ‘You spoke about building a house here. Is this why? Are you really going to settle here? Or are you going to swan off for another fifteen years and leave me to raise this kid?’
‘When we came last month, I didn’t expect to feel the way I did about all of you, and about this place.’ I lean on the freshly painted hall wall for support. ‘I missed you all so much. Missed this house. Missed having a home. I thought I found one at Huxley Castle with Victoria’s family, but I was only playing happy families there. Trying to fill the void of my own.’
Andie’s features knit into a sympathetic expression. Her mouth opens, but I silence her with a raised finger, needing her to hear what I have to say.
