‘And you are?’ My clipped tone could cut through steel.
She and Marcus exchange a look. She says, ‘a friend,’ at the same time as he says, ‘the babysitter.’
‘The least you could do is get your fucking story straight.’ It comes out almost as a hiss as Emily and Erin run into the kitchen.
‘Mammy, you’re home early!’ Throwing themselves round my thighs, they squeeze me into the tightest embrace. I take a huge deep breath and exhale slowly. Placing the wine on the kitchen counter, I crouch at their eye level and hug them both to me, pressing them against my chest, needing their hugs right now more than they ever could need mine.
Over Emily’s shoulder, I notice another girl loitering in the kitchen doorway; she too wears a Disney dress. She’s the image of the blonde. Her huge hazel eyes stare at me in the way that only children can get away with. Strong chiselled cheekbones promise a beauty she hasn’t yet grown into. As she inclines her head towards her mother, something a million times more alarming strikes me like a thunderbolt from the sky.
It’s not only her mother that she looks like; she’s the absolute fucking image of my husband. A carbon mini copy.
‘Why don’t you go back to your games, girls, and leave the grown-ups to talk? I’ll run you a bath in a little while.’ Patting them on the back, I manage to rise from the floor, even as my legs tremble like a new-born fawn beneath me.
The second the girls leave the room Marcus grabs my arm. ‘It’s not what it looks like, Shell.’ He gestures to the blonde who, in fairness to her, looks just as shocked as me. Surely she knows he’s married?
‘This is Maddy. She’s been helping me out lately with the new club. Well, she’s been minding the girls while I’ve had meetings. Erin and Zoe are in the same class. They just moved here from America.’
‘Hi, Maddy, from America. I’m Shelly, Marcus’s wife of almost ten years.’ Sarcasm hangs on my every syllable.
‘Wife… of course. It’s lovely to meet you.’ She extends a tanned hand out to shake mine, but I can’t bring myself to do anything other than stare at it and wonder how many times it’s touched my husband.
‘I think I should probably leave now.’ Well, at least we can both agree on that. She places her wine glass on the counter and calls her daughter. Their daughter. Blood drains from my face to my chest, boiling in the place where my heart used to be, right before Marcus ripped it clean out of my chest.
No wonder he hasn’t come near me in weeks. He’s obviously been getting it somewhere else. Wereallthe rumours true over the years? Have I been fooling myself throughout our entire marriage? All those tours with the team. Was he unfaithful the whole time? A vicious pain crushes my chest, making the simple act of breathing damn near impossible.
Maddy puts on Zoe’s coat, our own two girls thankfully still engrossed in their game.
‘It was nice meting you, Shelly.’ Maddy offers a tentative smile in my direction. Is she having a fucking laugh? Has she no shame? It takes every ounce of strength I possess to bite my tongue, and it’s only for the sake of the children. I know what it’s like growing up in a toxic environment and no matter how much hurt rages inside of me, I won’t show it in front of them.
‘I’ll see you tomorrow,’ she says to Marcus, shooting him a sympathetic glance. He’ll need more than sympathy by the time I’ve finished with him. He’ll need fucking surgery. I bide my time until they are out of the room and the front door clicks behind them.
‘Of all the promises you ever made to me, being faithful was one I was certain you’d never break.’ It’s barely more than a whisper. I can’t risk the girls overhearing a second of this, refusing to have their trust broken too. When a parent is unfaithful, it scars a child for life. I learned first-hand. How could it not? When the people they trust to teach them right from wrong set such an example, in their tiny impressionable minds, what hope is there for them? I don’t want them to question themselves, and every future partner they ever meet, because of what they’ve experienced in their childhood.
My heart shatters into a thousand tiny shards that seep into my blood stream, cutting me into ribbons from the inside out.
Ben and I were only ever performing. Unfortunately, the connection I saw between those two, is undoubtably the real deal.
