"Um..." Cora switches from walking down the right steps to the left to avoid a group gathered in the aisle ahead. "Honestly..." She glances back at me and takes another long drink, her cup already at the halfway mark.
I'm going to have to make sure she eats so she doesn't get too fucked up, too quick.
She continues, "The list is pretty long."
I chuckle and put my hand on her lower back again to guide her, only to remove it a second later when I can literally feel Simon's eyes burning a hole through my face. "You? Angry? Bubbly, sweet Cora?"
Cora scoffs. "You'd be surprised what's hidden under this makeup and blonde hair."
But doesn't she have any clue that I desperately want to find out? I want to uncover every layer she keeps tucked away from the world. I want her to feel safe enough to tell me, confide in me, and let me be the rock that she is to everyone else. Except, how can I say that without sounding like a complete psycho who's obsessed with her? We aren't even dating. Sure, I confessed my feelings for her, and they were sort of reciprocated, but this is new—too delicate. I don't want to scare her away with how much I care for her.
"I'd like to see it," I tell her, teasing that fine line of being too damn much.
Cora pauses in her step and turns around, placing her hand on my chest and breathing in deeply before saying, "There's a lot you don't know about me, Alec. A lot no one knows about me. I promise I am way more fucked up in the head than I appear on the outside. This”—she floats her finger in the vague direction of her body—“is a perfectly orchestrated act that I put on every morning when I wake up. If you saw the real me, you'd probably change your mind."
I open my mouth to speak, to protest, to make her understand that she's wrong, but Simon approaches, puts his arm over Cora's shoulder, and deadpans when he thinks she isn't looking at him.
"What happened to your date, Cor?" he asks her.
She tilts her head up toward him, and the look of disdain vanishes. "Stomach bug. He had to cancel. Alec subbed in." Cora slips out from under his grasp. "Hope that's okay with you because it's okay with me." She pats him on the back before walking away and meeting June halfway down the next row of seats.
Simon, with his perfect face and perfect hair and perfect girlfriend and perfect life, narrows his gaze. "A word."
It's not a question, definitely more of a demand.
I guess this is the price to pay for the short temporary bliss of finally telling Cora how I feel and acting on the impulses I've kept at bay for far too long.
He plants his hand on my shoulder, his fingers digging in. "I love you like a brother. You've been good to me, to June, to the guys. But Cora is June's best friend. What makes Cora happy, makes June happy, makes me happy. But what makes Cora sad, makes June sad, makes me furious. Get my drift, ponyboy?"
"Mmhm."
"You know I have no issue getting rid of a problem if it arises, right?" He stares back and forth between my eyes for a long second. "I'd hate to have to find someone to replace you."
There it is, the death threat that's cloaked in mystery.
"I understand," I tell him.
Simon squeezes me a bit tighter before releasing me. "Good. Good talk."
"But—" I blurt out as he's turning around, my foot no doubt being shoved in my mouth.
"Always a but." Simon pinches the bridge of his nose between his fingers. "Listen, before you tell me you love her, that you wouldn't hurt her, just know that I don't want to hear it. You filled in for her date, that's it. Cora is off-limits. I'll tell you the same thing I told Miller. No."
He leaves without allowing me another word, the weight of that entire interaction pressing down and smashing me into the earth.
What did he mean he told Miller no? Had he already shown interest in her to him? And Simon shut him down? Miller is equally, if not more powerful than Simon, so if he's not allowed to pursue her, I sure as shit am not going to be able to. I have no authority here. I'm just a driver and almost an architect. Miller is the head of an entire East Coast criminal organization. But if Simon told him no, why did Miller buy an entire building, spending a hundred million dollars to fire a guy who was bothering Cora?
Maybe Miller isn't listening to Simon's threats...and maybe I shouldn't either.
What kind of man would I be if I backed down and missed out on what could be the greatest love of my life?
One thing is certain, something is going to get broken, and I don't know whether it's going to be all the bones in my body or my heart.
And I don't know which one would be worse.
13
CORA
