TruthGuardian
That’s…actually a valid point.
SunshineGuy
Did you just agree with me? Should I screenshot this for posterity?
TruthGuardian
I said it was valid, not that you were right. There’s a difference. But yeah, writing gives you time to think and not completely embarrass yourself.
SunshineGuy
Exactly! Like, I’m way smoother in writing. I once responded to a guy who said, “I like your shirt,” with, “Thanks, it has buttons.”
I can’t help laughing, which is becoming an inconveniently frequent response to SunshineGuy’s messages.
TruthGuardian
That’s…interesting. What did they say?
SunshineGuy
“Yes…most shirts do.”
TruthGuardian
Did you then explain the history of button manufacturing? Because that’s where my brain would’ve gone.
SunshineGuy
Thankfully, I didn’t. But I’ll remember that for next time.
TruthGuardian
I think we’re just providing evidence as to why we spend so much time writing carefully edited messages to strangers on the internet.
SunshineGuy
That’s true. But I’m actually about to go on a date with a real person tonight, so I consider that progress.
A date. The words register with an impact that seems disproportionate. Of course he has a date. He’s probably charming in real life, all sunshine and optimism and believing the best in people. I’m sure he’s searching for his own story that he can post about in QueerWaystoFallinLove, complete with some ridiculous meet-cute that I’ll inevitably have to verify.
And I’m bothered by this. Which is data I’m choosing not to examine too closely.
I’ve taken too long to reply, and the next message from him pops up.
SunshineGuy
So I’m preparing myself to risk having to communicate face-to-face without the safety net of editing my responses three times.
I swallow hard.
TruthGuardian
Have fun on your date. Maybe don’t mention your passionate defense of people who fall in love during colonoscopy prep. That’s third-date material at best.
SunshineGuy
