“Please what?” she asked just as softly.
Again, he didn’t answer her. Or couldn’t. Instead he spun her around, placing her back against the door, and kissed her hard. She immediately responded, but after a moment, she realized what was happening.
With her heartbeat beating in her breast, she turned her head to the side, though it was one of the hardest things she’d ever done.
Khiva stilled but kissed her cheek softly where his lips landed.
“Kasari, Evelyn,” he said before stepping back.
Eve’s hand was frozen on the door handle, but eventually she opened it, letting the early morning chill sweep in. Wrapping her arms around her waist, she watched as he pulled up his hood to cover his face, his eyes never leaving her.
“Goodbye,” she whispered, feeling that word tear through her chest.
He hesitated on the threshold for a moment longer.
And when he finally stepped through, with one last touch to her cheek, she felt…undone. She watched him get into the car. A short while after, it pulled away from the curb, away from her.
It only took Eve 25 years to experience her first love, her first lover.
And her first heartbreak.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Khiva restlessly paced the floor of his mating room, certain he was wearing tracks in the already worn carpet.
It was Thursday evening, the night of Evelyn’s scheduled visit. Valerie had told him that she hadn’t called to cancel the booking, which had relieved him immensely, but something told him that she might not come.
After their last parting, Khiva could understand why she might never want to see him again. And while at the time, he thought he was doing the honorable thing, the past week had been miserable and dark and lonely. He’d hardly slept because every time he closed his eyes, he saw her, her expression sad, her gaze questioning, and he woke up furious with himself for hurting her and second-guessing his decision.
Khiva went to the window and looked out, towards the Lake District, and his chest squeezed with loss.
He thought he’d been making the right decision, a step towards self-preservation when she inevitably eventually grew tired of spending credits to visit him. Because what future did they have?
He was a Krave whore, under Madame Allegria’s control…and she was a human, with her entire life ahead of her. She was beautiful, kind, wealthy, and sensual. She could have any number of adoring males or perhaps a mate who could give her the things Khiva wanted to give her.
His fists clenched at his sides, just thinking about other males with hisleeldra. But he’d never be able to give her what they could. Not anymore. Not on Everton.
His feelings for her were…unparalleled. Frightening. Beautiful.
Letting her go, however, or giving her the choice to stay, knowing they could never have the future they wanted, seemed cruel, but eventually, she would understand why.
So why did he want to be selfish? Why did he want her to come, so that that he could hold her and have her kiss and her soft eyes, knowing that eventually she would realize the truth? Knowing that eventually they would both be hurt when they were forced their separate ways?
And that was only if Madame Allegria didn’t discover their relationship first. If she found out…there was no telling what she would do.
Khiva growled, his head pounding.
It didn’t help that his Rut was near. He should’ve told Valerie to cancel Evelyn’s visit that night, because he could feel it on the verge of breaking. But it was another selfish decision. He wanted to see her, needed to see her. He could hold it off for another few hours, if only to have a few hours with her. For her, he would control it.
His breath hitched when he heard movement outside his door and he turned, already halfway across the room, when it opened.
Bright relief burst when he saw Evelyn on the threshold and he acted purely on instinct.
“Leeldra,” he growled, rushing her, cupping her chin and tilting her mouth up. He needed to taste her, needed to feel her warmth against him, anything to soothe the restlessness inside him.
He kissed her, slowly at first, trying to pour everything he wanted her to understand into that kiss. And for a moment, she responded, gripping his shoulders tightly.
But then her hands trailed down to his chest and she pushed lightly. “Khiva,” she sighed, turning her face to the side.
