“Hello, everyone. As you can see, I’m alive and well. Sorry for causing any alarm, but sometimes you just need time to switch off from the world and focus on yourself. It’s something I’ve always done whenever I’ve needed that mental break, but I guess that’s not an option for me anymore, given the reaction my absence has caused.”
Felix’s breath hitched. Ryder had a serious expression on his face. His tone was as warm as always, but the message was clear.
“You’ll have seen the photos online yesterday of what really happened. I’ll admit that I assumed the worst as well.”
Felix pressed pause. “What happened?” he asked Annie.
“I only just saw them myself, but there are pictures which show you pushing Sam off you after the kiss, and then you throwing up and him carrying you into the apartment.”
Felix wasn’t sure it was possible to feel deliriously happy and cringingly embarrassed at the same time, but here he was. Annie was supposed to have been monitoring things and flagging anything he’d want to know about. It wasn’t something he would pick up with her now, if ever. He pressed play again.
“Many years ago, I was in love with a man, and he cheated on me with his ex-boyfriend. When I saw what the person who took those photos wanted me to see, all that pain from the past came back and I couldn’t see beyond it. I didn’t give the man I love the chance to tell me his side of the story.”
Felix felt tears sting his eyes at Ryder’s words. He didn’t think it would be possible for him to feel the same way.
“I think there’s something for us all to learn here. Wemake assumptions and people get hurt. If any of you watching this video attacked Felix, whether that was just by liking a nasty comment, or by driving him away from his apartment, I ask that you hit the unfollow button right now. You’re not welcome here. I’m not even sure I want to make more content if these are the people it attracts. This is supposed to be a place for us to have fun, learn about fitness, and get turned on by my thirst pics.”
Felix couldn’t help but laugh through the tears, which were now in full flow.
“Now, this part of the video is just for Felix, so the rest of you can disappear.”
Felix chuckled as Ryder waited for a few seconds. Like anyone was going to stop watching the rest.
“Felix O’Sullivan. I love you and I’m so sorry I hurt you. If you’re willing to give me another chance, I’ll be waiting for you at seven o’clock, at that place you said you’d let me take you to on a date if we made it to Christmas Eve. I know that’s still a week away, but I can’t wait any longer. You’re it for me, and all I can do is hope you’ll forgive me and let me do everything I can to make it up to you. And I don’t just mean in the bedroom,” he added, with a grin and a pump of his eyebrows.
Felix laughed, and then his face flamed, realizing that everyone would be watching this.
“I hope I’ll see you soon. Love you.”
He winked at the camera, blew a kiss, and the recording stopped. Felix looked at the tablet, unsure what to say, and then broke down. Annie pulled him into a hug and let him cry it out.
“Do you know where you need to meet him?”
He nodded. Ryder had wanted to give him the full “Ryder Quinn experience” as he’d described it, with no expense spared. That wasn’t something Felix wanted, but there was always one Christmas thing he’d wanted to do in New York.It wasn’t expensive at all, and something Felix could have done for himself, but he’d had no one to do it with, and it wasn’t an activity he wanted to do with a friend.
“Do you think I should go?” he asked.
“Did you not watch the video? If you’re not going, I’ll go, and you can have Paul.”
They both laughed. She would never give up Paul, but the joke was appreciated.
“What time is it?”
“Four o’clock.”
“How am I going to get to the city in three hours?”
“I’m going to drive you to Stamford Station, and the train only takes an hour.”
“What’s if there’s a delay?”
“Well, get your shit together so we can get out of here, then.”
The next twenty minutes were a flurry of activity. Annie ironed one of his shirts while Felix had a shower and tried to make himself look less pale. His hair was being difficult, so Annie smacked his hands out of the way and sorted it out. It wasn’t his fault. His fingers were trembling.
He bought his train ticket online and was at the station twenty minutes before it departed. Felix would arrive at Grand Central with an hour to spare. He’d said goodbye to Annie, and promised to let her know as soon as he’d spoken to Ryder. Laura was planning to meet him at Grand Central and was being all gushy about the video.
Everything in the last hour had been such a whirlwind. It wasn’t until he’d been on the train for ten minutes that he realized he was being watched. Nobody said anything, they just stared at him. Some were taking photos or videos, and then reality hit him. He loved Ryder, but was this what his life was going to be like if they were together? Felix wanted to be successful with his photography, but he didn’t want the limelight. What Ryder had was of no interest to him. He liked hisprivacy, and that would be gone. This would be his life. Not wanting to engage with anyone who was watching him, he looked at his phone. Social media was still blocked to him, and he was grateful he hadn’t bothered to sort it out. His curiosity would have gotten the better of him by now. How had people reacted to the video? Ryder had called people out for their reactions to his break from social media. Were they angry about that? Nobody was looking at him with anger. It was more curiosity.
