That was the good thing about Rowan. He never lied to me. Gilding the truth with gold didn’t make it any less hurtful. I nodded.
“If someone I loved treated me the way Caelan treated you, I would assume that person never really loved me at all.”
I sucked in a sharp gasp, but Rowan plowed on.
“If love has conditions, it’s no better than a business arrangement. There are all kinds of love, Evie, but what happened with him is not a love mates have for one another.”
Mate. Not the first time I’d heard the term, though it wasn’t something Caelan and I had ever truly sat down and discussed. Not in the way we needed to. Not after this.
“When you are mates, you know each other’s souls. You know there is no doubt, no hesitation. You’re both all in all the time.” He smiled with a quick flash of teeth. “Being mates does not mean you won’t fight with each other. Disagreements are normal, no matter what kind of relationship you’re in. It also doesn’t mean either one of you is perfect, but it does mean you’re perfect for each other.”
I studied him. “How do you know when you find your mate?”
Rowan said nothing for a while. “It’s different for everyone. Sometimes it’s like a bolt of lightning. Sometimes it takes a while for a bond to grow. Sometimes it doesn’t happen until after intimacy. But every shifter can sense when a bond is building, though many try to deny it until it’s too powerful.”
“Why would anyone deny something that sounds so beautiful?”
He slid a glance my way. “Because men, no matter what species they are, happen to be idiots.”
Our laughter breaks the building tension, but we’re not even an hour into the drive, and I have more questions. “Why would Caelan want to marry me if we aren’t mates?”
He took his time answering this, too. “I hesitate to speak for him. That’s a question only he can answer. Not everyone is fortunate enough to find their mate. But he’d be a fool not to pursue you. You’re powerful, beautiful, intelligent, and kind. You take no shit, fight for your friends and what’s right, and you have a gift that makes the world a better place.”
My cheeks heated at his words. “But he still thought I was flawed. He didn’t think I would be a good leader to his people.” I groaned and rubbed my face, hating that my voice sounded small.
“I have no dog in this fight,” Rowan said, though fury vibrated in his voice. “You are the fae queen, Evie. You could have your pick of any man on the planet.”
I snorted. “Charmer.”
But his face was still serious. “It’s true. You hold more power than any of the Lords, any non-human in the entire world right now.”
I blinked, which made him huff a laugh. “Never thought of it that way, have you?”
“Shit. No. The queen thing came because Lugh was being a dick, and I needed help.”
“Your father strong-armed you?”
I rolled my eyes. “Of course he did. We need to talk about that, too. If I stay here, he will have to visit. And Barrett, too. I still don’t know a lot of what I need to rule a kingdom, and my training remains incomplete.” I sighed. “Because people won’t stop fucking with me.”
Rowan grinned. “You’re the fae queen, Evie. Your father does not need my permission to visit you. Barrett, on the other hand,will be required to check in. The Chimera are new to society, or at least to most of us.”
“Thank you.”
We fell silent for a while, and it was a companionable one. Snow started falling, a gentle wisp of flurries lightly coating the ground and road. Not enough to be dangerous, but Rowan reduced his speed a little anyway. “Does that mean you’re seriously thinking about staying?” he asked later.
There were only a few cons and so many pros, so yes, I really was thinking about uprooting my life once more. “I have a lot to think about, but yes.”
Rowan reached over and took my hand, lacing our fingers together. “I’m glad. You deserve to be happy. You deserve a fresh start. I know you can take care of yourself, but you’ll have an added level of protection here. My territory is more densely populated than Caelan’s. He has more open land and a larger area, but I have many more powerful paranormals here, and we defend our own.”
“I’m not part of this place. Not yet. I never fully assimilated into Joy Springs. There were things I could never tell them, secrets I had to keep.”
“Every citizen here knows what you are.”
My jaw dropped. “What?” I stared at him, completely stunned. “Is there a…newsletter or something? Gods, Rowan. You dropped a bomb on those poor people!”
“There is, in fact, a newsletter. Let me know if you want to be added.”
I smacked his arm. Rowan laughed and smoothly changed lanes to exit onto another highway. “This was a meeting of the town reps. We had a vote.”
