Life worked funny as hell. Crescent had no idea. If he knew just how funny life was when it came to us, he’d be blown away. Like me.
“Sure is.”
“So, what up? You lettin me buy you a drink?”
I told him yeah. It was harmless. Him sitting having a drink with me. A couple of weeks ago, before everything, when I was still in my head about what we did, I would have declined. Would have probably asked my sisters to go to another bar. But fuck it. I really did miss being in his presence. Missed smelling the scent of his cologne. Missed hearing his deep baritone and his wild, unbiased take on things. Seeing Crescent tonight, was at first jarring but satisfying immediately after.
It was in the way he looked at me. He made me feel seen and not in a way that felt judgmental. He looked at me as if he was truly looking at me. Who I was. Not just on the surface. It was in the way he felt. Standing in front of him, practically chest-to-chest, I really wanted to close the space and kiss him. Finish what we started in that elevator last week. I know, I know. Ridiculous. But I couldn’t stay mad at him for long. He was magnetic. His aura. His energy. He made me want to leave thebar completely. Crescent made me hungry. Felt like he could be just the escape I needed.
Reluctantly, we parted ways. I left the hallway, and he went into the men’s room. I wondered if he went in because he actually had to use it or if he was giving me the opportunity to go out first not to raise suspicion.
“So, look, I owe Crescent a drink,” I said, sitting down. “They’re going to come?—”
“You owe him a drink? Your client?” Hazel sucked her teeth. “Bitch you trying to be fast and you got a husban?—”
“Fuckmy husband,” I said through a harsh whisper.
I’d had enough. I couldn’t help myself. I was so tired of her mentioning that nigga, bro. I didn’t want to hear about being married. Didn’t want to hear about no fuckin’ husband.
“What?” Hazel said, drawing back.
“You heard me,” I snapped. “You so worried about me being married… y’all want to know what my husband did? Hm? While you keep bringing him up? Huh Hazel?”
Sienna cut in, “Mahogany?—”
“No… shut up, Sienna. I’m tired of you giving me looks, trying to talk about the shit too. My husband… the nigga y’all can’t stop reminding me of? He had a fucking baby on me, okay?”
They went quiet. I know I said I didn’t want to talk about it. Said right now wasn’t the time or place but fuck that. Hazel was getting on my muthafucking nerves. Sienna too. I didn’t want to keep being reminded of that fuckin’ nigga.
“Now please,leave it the fuck alone. Fuck Ducati. Keep bringing that bitch ass nigga up to me if you want to. I don’t want to talk about it, neither. So let it be.”
Looking away, I put my eyes on Crescent and decided, fuck it. I didn’t want to do this anymore. Be with them. Sit and have drinks with them. After spilling my tea, the energy shiftedand who wanted to be around that? Awkward looks of pity. Questions lingering in their eyes. All of which I wanted to avoid. Maybe I should have kept my mouth shut, but I couldn’t help it.
“Look… I’m leaving. I’m going to?—”
“No, you’re not,” Sienna said, as if she could really stop me.
“Yes the fuck I am. This is exactly why I didn’t want to be bothered. Y’all could have left me at the house.”
“You mad at us because we care?” Hazel asked, with a frown. “How in the hell does that make any sense?”
It didn’t make sense. I was leaving because I was embarrassed. I was leaving because I needed to escape. I was leaving because I wanted to be with him. He made me feel good. He wasn’t a reminder. He made me forget.
“I just need a minute,” I said before grabbing my bag. “Do not follow me. Both of y’all have my locations. Sienna, I’m not going to ask you to cover for me because there’s nothing to cover me from. Do what y’all want to with the information I just gave y’all. Tell momma and them... I do not give a fuck anymore.”
With that I got up and headed over to where Crescent and his boys were. From behind, I heard Hazel tell Sienna not to worry about it. But apparently she didn’t listen because she was on my heels.
She grabbed my arm. “What are you doing?”
“I just told you what I was about to do. Let me go, Si,” I said through teary eyes.
I wasn’t supposed to be like this. I was buzzing and high and just wanted to enjoy that.
“You crazy as hell if you think I’m about to just let you leave with that man and you’re like this.”
“I’m like what?” I asked. “How am I, Sienna?”
Sienna looked off, sighed and shook her head. “Listen… You’re not leaving.”
