“I’m a single mom,” I add.
“Whenever you’re ready to date, that won’t be a problem with whomever you choose. If they’re worth your time, they won’t care,” Allie replies.
“And if they care, tell me, and I’ll hunt their ass down,” Roe adds.
Allie nods. “Okay, let’s just leave Nat alone, okay?”
This was exhausting.
Exhausting.
“I love you all, but I’m exhausted. See you soon?” I ask as they get up from the couch and gather their things. I walk them to the door, and after hugs and promises of keeping them posted, I shut the door and walk to my room with a smile on my face. It’s obliterated by how overwhelming even the thought of sharing a part of my life with others is.
I barely share with them the mile-long to do list I have, let alone with a stranger for the sake of dating. But they’re right; my girls are a huge part of who I am, a positive part. I don’t even want to think about anyone else not cherishing them the way I do.
But that's for another day. Tonight, I go to bed grateful for the life I have.
4
COACH CLAY
don’t stop believin’ by Slo
Holden
When my oldcoach asked me to lead this group of girls a town over from ours, it was a no-brainer, especially with Liam by my side. Not because I wanted to be back on the ice—quite the opposite, actually. All Liz, my little sister, ever wanted was for me to coach her on hockey, and I never did. I promised myself that if the opportunity presented itself, I would take it in honor of her. So, here I am, Tuesday night, at the rink, with a bunch of teens.
Liam used to play left wing on the same team as me, and we both retired the same year. We also live in the same town. Not by coincidence, but by life.
He opened the doors of his home to me when I needed it the most, so I made Magnolia Springs my home. I knew the only person I wanted to do it with was him. We both knew what we were signing up for when we agreed to run this intro clinic—three months, twenty girls, all new to hockey. Maybe this is the purpose my life needs now.
The loud thud makes my head turn faster than it would have ten years ago. There’s a surprise element that comes with this team, and I, for one, hate surprises. As a kid, surprises are unexpected fun, carefully curated by people who love you. But when life is the one dealing the cards, surprises don’t tend to be positive. They steal your breath and break you in half.
I turn and let out a breath when I see the source of the thud.
Izzy again.
She slams into the boards like she’s trying to break through them, limbs flying, stick tumbling, helmet slightly crooked. The girl is as coordinated as a middle schooler who grew two feet overnight.
“I’m good!” she yells before I can even react. “That was on purpose!”
I skate over, grin already tugging at the corner of my mouth. “Working on your wall-checking, huh?”
She laughs as I help her up. “I was testing my balance.”
“Oh yeah? And what did you find out from that theory?”
“Oh, very funny, Coach Clay.” We both chuckle.
I glance across the ice. Half the girls are still doing figure eights around the cones Liam set up earlier. The other half is in a giggling pile near the net.
“Alright, circle up!” I call, tapping my stick on the ice.
Liam skates over beside me, his beanie crooked under his helmet.
None of them have quit yet, which feels like a miracle, just like I haven’t is another one. Even being on the ice makes my skin prickle; leaving the arena is worse. The last time I saw my mom and Liz was under those fluorescent street lamps as I waved them goodbye.
“Are you coming?”
