“Okay.” She squeezes my right hand, comforting. “Let me see if Reece can take me home later.”
She disappears to follow Reece into the other room. I feel horrible leaving her but I can’t stay any longer. As if being here wasn’t torture enough, it’s what Casen is doing that solidifies my decision to get the fuck out of here. His arms are wrapped around Kate in an embrace. She seems to be soothing him as much as he is consoling her. Just seeing him touching another woman feels like a knife is being twisted into my heart. I’m supposed to be the one by Casen’s side. I’m the one who should have him in my arms, telling him that everything will be okay.
I look away, grabbing my arms tightly. Everyone is with someone and I’m standing here alone, with no one. The room starts to tilt and goose bumps prickle my skin. I feel as though eyes are on now me, and the walls are closing in. My heart begins to beat harder and faster, and I’m sure at any moment it will burst through my ribs and out of my skin. A panic attack is creeping up my body from my toes to my lungs. I have to get out of here.
Making a mad dash for the doors, I push past the crowd of people who are attempting to get inside. I hear grumblings about how rude I’m being but I don’t care. If I don’t breathe in some fresh air I might have this attack inside the walls of this funeral home. No one wants to see that, especially me.
Once outside, I find the clouds have dissipated slightly and the vitamin D of the sun hits my face. I relish in the heat for a moment before I inhale a lung full of fresh air and fall back against the bricks of the building.
Deep breath in. Deep breath out. Deep breath in. Deep breath out.
My eyes shut, and my head drops to my chest when I finally start to calm. My inhales and exhales have returned to normal but it doesn’t last long.
“Embyr.” He calls.
Casen.
The sound of his voice is like lightning to my body. All my senses switch to high alert. I can hear the muttering of those around us and the birds chirping. I can see the rapid rising and falling of his chest, and his clenched fists. I can smell the rain that fell earlier, dampening the ground. The brick wall feels harsh against my arms, and I can only speak his name like a breathless whisper. “Casen.”
He hesitates before shortening the distance between us with purpose. He traps me against the wall, his face growing ever closer until its mere inches from my own. He still owns my body. That much I know from its draw to his. His breath caresses my cheek, one, two, three times until his soft voice finds my ears. “What are you doing here?”
My voice comes out small and timid. “I wanted to pay my respects to Ian.”
His nose travels down the side of my neck, and he inhales when it meets my shoulder. “I could sense you were here. You make me weak, Embyr. I want to be strong.”
My eyes flutter shut. “Casen. I’m so sorry.”
He pushes off the bricks, giving himself a good three feet between the two of us now. The veins in his neck are popping out. My body is still in overload from the small tease of contact he just gave me. A switch flips and he’s gone from desperate to angry.
“No!” he harshly whispers, pointing a finger at me. “I can’t have you here.”
“Casen.” I step closer to him, begging. “Please.”
“You don’t get to be here while I mourn my friend.” His voice rises. “Leave!” The forlorn look is replaced by disgust. When I don’t budge his command gets louder. “LEAVE!”
In an instant, Trinity is by my side and Reece has Casen’s bicep. “You okay?” she asks checking my face for who knows what.
“Annie is just fine, Trin.” He sneers. “Or are you in on this too? Is your name even Trinity?”
Reece pulls Casen back. “Don’t, Casen. Not here, not now.”
Casen shrugs him off and Trinity takes a protective stance in front of me.
“Go.” Casen growls, just before he falls to the ground.
Without a word, Trinity hands me her keys, and I waste no time running to the car, but not before I hear Casen tell Reece, “I love her, man. How could she do this to me?”
