“I think they never held me back because we’re betrothed.”
“Vera said the thorns allowed you and the others inside because you love Lydel.” I’d wanted to think that meant Vexxion loved me since I was the high lady of this court, but perhaps he loved the roses.
He came up behind me, standing close enough I could feel his warmth seeping into my back. He didn’t press himself against me, and he didn’t hold me like he would’ve in the past, which ripped apart my heart once more. I was holding on because I had to, but damn did it hurt. All the time.
“I know I love you,” he said softly. “It’s somewhere inside me. I wish I could touch it.Feelit, because I believe that feeling defines who I am and who I will always be.”
I closed my eyes, but while this cut the flowers from my sight, it did nothing to close off my emotional turmoil. Opening them, I stepped away from him. I couldn’t do this if he was close. It was a tease. Not on his part but by the fates. They heldhim out to me, but each time I tried to touch him with love, they yanked him away.
“When did you first come here?” I asked.
“When I was twelve. I knew we were betrothed, and I’d heard of the curse. I wanted to see it, I suppose. I’d been here once when I was very small. I could barely remember anything about that visit that must’ve come before the king took me and my mother. We went inside the manor, but I didn’t have the rooms solid in my mind. But these,” his hand swept out to the flower beds, “I remembered them and this garden. The thorns allowed me to flit through without a challenge, and that’s when I realized there may be no curse, but a spell placed by your mother. Because I saw she loved them when we visited, and I was equally enthralled by their beauty, I flitted here whenever I could. At first, it was an escape from what I faced at Bledmire, but then it became my purpose. I told myself that as long as I kept these roses alive, you would also live. That I would find you and things would be better.”
“You saw my image when you were five.”
He lifted his arm, revealing the mark on his wrist. My own tingled as if him calling attention to his generated a connection with mine. “This appeared, and I knew. I was just a boy, so I didn’t feel anything romantic, of course, but back then, I told myself that no matter what was done to me, no matter how horrible my life was, there was someone out there who was waiting for me.” His gaze met mine. “You.”
“And now we’re here in Lydel and together.”
“We’re betrothed.”
I didn’t want to marry him if he didn’t love me. Him wantingto love me was a completely different thing, and it wasn’t enough. If I’d grown up here, we would’ve met. Would we have fallen in love? I suspected no matter who he was or where he lived, our souls would’ve connected.
Why wasn’t his soul connecting with mine now?
I was too impatient. It hadn’t been long.
My goal was to raise an army and lead the charge to kill Ivenrail. Doing it without Vexxion by my side would gut me.
Such a selfish thought. The king needed to die to restore balance, and if that was all that came from this, I had to accept it. Maybe once this was over, Vexxion and I could find our way to each other again.
I carefully plucked a flower and flitted to our bedroom, where I placed the bloom in a vase. Picking them for myself instead of Vexxion doing it for me almost felt like a betrayal.
Or the beginning of me walking down a lonely path without him.
Because tears kept springing up in my eyes, I left the flower, striding into the sitting area where I picked up one object after another, mindlessly making my way around the room. Thoughts spiraled through my mind, something that could either be a good thing or the start of my ruin.
Vexxion didn’t follow me, and I wasn’t sure what to think about that.
I loved him. Was that enough for both of us?
The journal that matched the one I’d left with Jessia glowed. I’d left it on a table in the sitting area, and if I hadn’t been looking that way, I would’ve missed it.
Hurrying over to it, I flipped it open to read her message.
It’s happening,she wrote.Three villages near the northern most fortress were attacked overnight by flying dregs. Dragon flights beat them back, but they lost half their riders and dragons.
Damn.How many villagers were taken?
None, oddly enough. What’s even worse,her words scribbled across the page before my eyes,Is that they only took out a quarter of our attacking force. There were so many flying dregs, they couldn’t count them, but they turned and fled.
Why do you think they left?I wrote.They could’ve pushed forward and taken villagers.
One of the other commanders thinks it was a test. That they’ll be back and the next time, they’ll take as many of us as they can.
We need to figure out how to fight them and fast.
You’re right. Suggestions?
