Clearing my throat, I swipe my fingers over my lips, as if that could lessen the impact of what I’m about to say. “I may have come to the realization that I’m wildly attracted to my client.”
His greying eyebrows jump toward his slightly receding hairline. “What are you going to do about it? Stop working for her?”
I’m shaking my head even before he finishes his sentence. “I don’t trust anyone to defend her.”
“You didn’t answer my question. What are you going to do about it?”
Pressing my fist to my mouth, I remember the decision I already came to this morning. “Absolutely nothing. I think I just needed to say it out loud to someone.”
Tom sighs. “Talk about shitty timing. For both of you.”
I huff a laugh, then mumble, “That’s a fucking understatement.”
I spend the next thirty minutes telling him about everything that’s happened over the last week. “And now she’s staying with me.”
Tom laughs and shakes his head. “So the woman you want and can’t have now lives with you?”
Nodding, I confirm, “Yeah, I’m in hell.”
He barks out a laugh. “Good luck with that.”
Glancing behind him, the clock on the wall catches myattention. “Shit, I have to go. I have a meeting with a new client, and if I miss it, Mandi will kill me. Or quit. And I’m not sure which will be worse.”
Tom chuckles. “She’s great. I miss chatting with her. Tell her to come visit sometime.”
Sadness seizes my lungs. Everyone in my life who’s met Tom loves him. He shouldn’t be here. I get into my car with a heavy heart, scared that I’m still not up to the task of making sure Lily doesn’t suffer the same fate.
17
Chris
Walking into the main part of the office, I tell Mandi, “I need to leave early. There’s something I have to do.”
Mandi glances up from her computer screen, her face filled with censure. “Please don’t tell me you’re going to see your new pseudo-client. Which, by the way, I haven’t seen the retainer come in for.”
Annoyance compresses around me. I know she means well, but the tone she’s using toward Lily pisses me off. I can’t imagine what she’d say if she knew Lily was basically living with me now.
Not being able to hold back, I snap, “Mandi, this is my law firm. If I want to take on pro-bono clients, that’s my choice. And it’s none of your goddamn business what I’m doing.”
Surprise and hurt filter across her face, and I feel like aneven bigger asshole than usual. I jam my fingers into my hair and bite out, “Fuck.”
She holds up a hand. “No, you’re right. I overstepped.”
My eyes close, and I shake my head as guilt consumes me. When I look back at one of the most important people in my life, I say, “You didn’t overstep. I’m an asshole, but I know you know that already,” I joke, somewhat relieved when I see a hint of a smile from her. “But to answer your question, Tom got onto me because I haven’t been by to see Seth. I was going to head over there, but I need to stop by the bank to get some cash.”
When Tom asked me to check in on Seth, it led me to give his mom money to make sure he’s taken care of. Which disgusts me to my very core that I’d ever give Christy a dime. But I have to remind myself that it’s for Tom and Seth, not her. The times that she hasn’t demanded I give her money, I slip the envelope to Seth instead. The first few times, I specifically told him that it was just for him and that he could spend it or save it, as long as it didn’t go to his mother. Now I don’t even have to tell him. We just have an unspoken agreement now. It helps that he’s older, and I think he’s started to understand the world more than when he was younger and sheltered from it.
Mandi’s face softens. “I know that’s hard for you. But I commend you for continuing to show up for that kid. One day, he’s going to realize who the good people in his life are. Don’t be surprised when he shows up at your door the second he turns eighteen.”
As someone who never really considered having kids, you’d think that would scare me. But all I feel is hope that he does make the decision to distance himself from his mother one day.
A smile that feels strained but hopeful lifts my lips. “Maybe one day that will happen. But until then, I have to go deal with that awful excuse of a human.”
“Good luck.” She opens her mouth to say something more, but quickly closes it.
Sighing, I tell her, “Go ahead. Say what you want to.”
She grimaces. “Well, I just wanted to say, I don’t really understand what’s happening with that woman, but I want you to know I support you in whatever it is.”
