“Yes.”
“He wanted to watch.”
“Yes.”
“He’s going to watch us, isn’t he?”
“I don’t know. He hasn’t said that. Would that make a difference to you?”
“I…don’t know.”
“He said you guys have done it before.”
Derek nodded, pressed his lips closed. “A long time ago. Christ, a lifetime ago. We were horny college students.”
Krissa wondered if Derek watching would ease Nate’s conscience about sleeping with her, or make him feel even worse. “Tell me. You have to tell me how you feel about this.”
He shrugged. “There’s nothing to say. It’s no big deal. It’s just a sperm donation. Right?”
Krissa stared at him. “Right.” She blinked. Is that really how he felt? “I certainly wouldn’t want you to do something that’s clearly repulsive to you.” She started to walk by him, not wanting to stick around and say something she might regret.
He grabbed her wrist, his fingers hard. She looked up at him. His mouth was a grim line of annoyance, his jaw tight. “Krissa. Don’t walk away from me.”
Her mouth dropped open. “What?”
“Don’t walk away.” He tugged her hand and she tried to yank it out of his grasp but he held tight.
“Let go of me.”
“No. Krissa. Don’t give in that easy. You’re pissed off at me. Stay and fight.”
“Whaaat!” Nobody in her life had ever said that to her. She’d walked away from many conflicts, always thought it was the best thing to do. She hated arguing, hated the sick feeling she got from the tension.
“You heard me. Say what you want to say.” His voice rasped.
“I’m not going to beg you to sleep with me. If it’s that difficult for you, I’m not going to force you.”
“Oh, God.” He rubbed his mouth. “Krissa. The problem is,it’snotdifficult.” He paused and looked at her.
She met his eyes, through the dark glasses. “Oh.” Did he mean…?
He tugged again on her hand, and his arms snared her, strong and hard, held her up against his body. She gasped and flattened her palms on his hard chest. His heart thudded beneath her hand, strong and sure. She was so close to him she could see the morning stubble he hadn’t yet bothered to shave, felt his breath against her forehead, saw her own reflection in his dark lenses, her mouth an astonished O, eyes wide.
Her hands slid to his shoulders. His chest pressed against her breasts and her nipples hardened. His mouth brushed hers. Not a kiss. He spoke, so close to her their breath mingled. “I want you, Krissa. I don’t want to want you, but I do.” He shifted his hips and his erection rubbed against her stomach. Everything inside her went hot and liquid. She whimpered. “It won’t be a hardship to fuck you.” His crude words made her belly flip. “That’s not what I’m worried about.”
“Whatareyou worried about?”
“That’s the part I haven’t figured out yet.” He brushed his mouth over hers again and stepped back, released her.
She stood there, chest heaving, heart racing. She swallowed. “Right now,” she whispered. “I want it right now.” More than anything. The intensity of her desire for Nate rushed over her and shocked her.
He stared back at her, breathing fast. “See. That’s the problem. We’re not supposed to want this. We’re supposed to be making a baby. Procreating. Artificial insemination without the artificial part.”
She choked on a laugh.
“This is supposed to be clinical and calculated. For one reason only—to get you pregnant.”
She pressed a hand to her quivering belly.
