“At first it was. The more I got to know you, the more I wanted. Then all that shit happened, and I’ve never felt closer to anyone in my life.” My admission was hard for me. It took a lot out of me to say that, but it’s the truth, and she needed to hear it.
“I needed you then,” she whispers.
“What about now, Anika? Do you need me now?” Asking her that chokes me up. What if she doesn’t? What if she says no, and this was all for nothing? I know what I’ve done to her, and I can’t change that. I know that this is hard for both of us, but I think I want this. I think I want her. No, I know I want her. She lowers her head, breaking eye contact with me. Is that my answer?
I shove off the bed and head for the door when she finally speaks.
“I do need you.” I turn slowly to face her, and she turns to face me. Our eyes lock, and something clicks between us. Something deeper than I thought I’d ever feel. Something more than I’d ever thought I could have.
I swallow hard as she slowly steps toward me. I don’t know what to do. Do I go to her? Do I grab her in my arms and hold her? It doesn’t matter. She chooses me. She steps into my space and her hands come up, slipping around my neck. She pulls my head down to her and presses her lips gently to mine. I’ve never kissed a girl this easily.
And yet here she is. And here I am. Kissing her back. The intensity between the two of us is almost too much to explain. The feelings that bloom in my chest feeling her here, in my arms, is something I’ve never felt before. I don’t know if I should love it or fear it.
Anika finally pulls her lips from mine, and I miss them immediately. My hands found their way to her hips at some point, and now my thumbs rub small circles.
“I don’t know where we go from here,” she says, looking at me.
“I don’t know either. I don’t know what to do,” I tell her.
“Are we too fucked up for this?” she finally asks the question that has been running wild inside me.
“I don’t know.” Anika steps back out of my arms and misses her being there. I want to grab her and hold her to me, but is it too much? Am I going too far? I don’t know how to handle this situation. I don’t know how to step around what’s already been done and move forward.
“I need to go talk to the guys,” I tell her. I know I need to be in church, but I’d much rather stay in here with her, in her presence. Anika nods her head before sitting on my bed. Does that mean she isn’t leaving my room? Will she be here when I get back?
With a quick nod, I turn and walk out the door, leaving her behind. I’m down the hall and into the main room when Bouncer passes me a beer.
“Ready for church?”
“If there’s good news,” I tell him.
“I think there is,” he says with a grin. I nod my head and take my beer into the room and find my seat. The rest of the guys file in and sit as well when Kal and Storm slowly walk in. Kal has some kind of file in his hand that he sets on the table in front of him before looking around at all of us.
“We didn’t have a lot to go on when Patch and Anika were taken. Video feeds showed men, obviously, but they weren’t wearing cuts. That threw us off. But Binker pulled some strings and managed to get this,” he says as he pulls a grainy photo from the file in front of him. He holds it up, and we all lean closer to see it.
“Bad Ryders?” I ask, seeing the tattoo that has been blown up.
“This was one of the guys who grabbed you,” Kal says, showing me the photo. I study the tattoo as anger rises inside me. It was them. The assholes that we were watching. We were getting intel on them.
“What the fuck?” I mumble under my breath.
“They must have caught wind that we were lookin’ into them. They moved in and made the grab,” Kal says.
“Motherfuckers. I will kill them all,” I growl.
“That’s the plan. Not only did they do this to you two, but they were connected to the killin’ of Rafe. We don’t let shit slide around here.”
“They what?” Binker snaps.
“Yeah. There have been connections that we didn’t put together. That’s on me. I should have seen it from the beginning.”
“Not your fault, Prez. They were sneaky little fucks,” Ban adds.
“What we need to vote on is how to handle this. We can blow the whole fuckin’ place sky high, or we can go in and grab them.”
“Grab them,” I roar before anyone else has the chance to say anything. I want blood on my hands. I want to know that each one of them is dead.
“I agree with Patch here. They made it personal,” Storm adds.
