“His doctor told him he needed to avoid any strenuous labor, too. We all took it really seriously for the first few weeks, but… over time, we just kind of fell back into the normal swing of things.”
His eyes turned glassy, and he glanced up at me, swallowing so hard that I heard it.
“He died of a heart attack because I let him help me with a casket transportation one day for a service. Our pallbearer had a family emergency and couldn’t make it, so it was just me and my dad that day. Iknewhe shouldn’t have been helping, but it was just to lift the casket into the hearse, and he’s been feelinggreat. He kept telling me he was fine…”
A tear spilled down his cheek, and I felt like my heart was cracking in my chest.
“Baby…” I murmured, cupping his face and wiping a tear away. “That’s not your fault.”
“Isn’t it?” Ryan asked, meeting my gaze head-on, and I could see how much he blamed himself for his father’s death. How long had he been holding onto this guilt?
“I was there when the doctor gave the orders. I should have fought him harder on it. There was that seed of doubt in the back of my head, telling me to stop him or refuse his help, but I didn’t, and now… now he’sgone.”
“Ryan…” I didn’t know what to say. Everything that came to mind felt insensitive.
“I can’t let that happen to you, Cal. If something happens because you push yourself too soon, I’ll never forgive myself.”
“Hey… stop it,” I growled softly, wrapping my hand around his nape. “What happened with your dad isnotyour fault. He was a grown man, and he was going to do what he wanted to do, whether you told him to or not.”
My ginger snap sniffed softly as I pressed my forehead against his.
“Listen to me. You said I remind you of him? If he was anything like me, then there was no stopping him from doing whatever the hell he wanted to do. He’s probably cursing you in his grave for blaming yourself for what happened. I know I would be.”
Ryan let out a choked laugh, and my heart soared at the fact that I had been able to make him smile.
Wrapping my arms around him, I pulled him into my chest. Still clutching the picture, he wrapped his arms around my waist and rested his head on my shoulder.
“Besides. That’s not going to happen to me. There’s a difference between a bullet wound and a chronic heart condition, Ryan. Dr. Callahan said six weeks. A couple days off isn’t going to make a difference. I know my body. As good as I’m sure fucking you will be, it’s not going to put me into cardiac arrest.”
Ryan burst out laughing, pulling back to look at me with tear-stained cheeks.
“That was an incredibly insensitive thing to say, Callum,” he chided me, though his tone said differently.
I shrugged, grinning down at him. “Tact has never been my strong suit.”
“You can say that again,” he grumbled, and I laughed, pulling the picture out of his hand so I could look at it again.
“In a plot twist that shocked no one, you were a cute fucking kid.” I beamed down at the little toothless version of Ryan.“Were lilies your dad’s favorite flower too? Is that why there’s so many of them in this photo?”
Ryan brushed his thumb fondly over the frame and sighed.
“This was taken after a pretty rough day at school.”
“Oh yeah? What happened?” I asked, already knowing from how sad he sounded that this story was going to piss me off.
He glanced up at me, biting his lower lip anxiously as if he were nervous to tell me.
“What?” I prodded. “Don’t look at me like that. Now Ineedto know.”
“If I tell you this story, you have to promise not to try to hunt anyone down and kill them.”
My mood immediately darkened.
“I can’t promise that.”
“Then I’m not telling you.”
I growled. “You might as well fucking tell me, or I won’t rest until I dig up whoever it was that hurt you in this story on my own. Trust me. You won’t like it if I have to find them myself.”
