I feel his hard erection press against my ass. Desire burns deep in my core. My nipples harden.
“How do you respond when your limits are pushed?” Then, “Have you dated girls on your own, without an arrangement?”
“That question wasn’t on the list,” he says.
I shake my head. “No, it wasn’t. Why are you so fixed on me? What makes me so special?”
If I don’t get off his lap, I’m going to do something I’ll regret, so I slide back into my own chair.
He leans forward, resting his hand on my thigh. “I’ve never pursued anyone besides you.”
I cock an eyebrow. “Why not?”
“Because I didn’t have to. Every woman I wanted came to me.”
“Have you had a real girlfriend before?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “No. You were my first girlfriend.”
“You’re twenty-three.”
“And?”
“So you never met a woman where you thought,Hey, I vibe with her?”
“Besides you? No. I only used them to get what I wanted out of them. Sex. It didn’t take much to do.”
“How does that make you feel?”
He shrugs. “I don’t care. The women I was with were boring.”
I don’t like how I feel special. And I don’t like how he makes me feel—like he actually wants me. I’m trying so hard not to blush, not to think about how I wanted him as much as he wanted me before he tricked me into this marriage. Old feelings are resurfacing. I lean back.
“What makes me so special, Irvin?”
He simply stares at me. “You’re not fake. You’re not using me. You like me for me. You’re honest with me. Even when you found out that I have ASPD, you didn’t flinch. You didn’t judge.”
“Is that your biggest fear? Being judged?”
He shakes his head. “No.” He smiles. “Figure that one out on your own, my princess.”
I jump up from the chair, closing my laptop. He gets up from his seat and leans forward, close to my ear.
“Nothing you ask me can be used against me, babe.” He presses a kiss to my head. “Let that be a lesson in manipulation.”
With that, he leaves the dining room. I tuck my MacBook under my arm and crinkle my nose.
It dawns on me—he seduced me to avoid answering my questions.
Bastard. He knew what I was doing. I am so fucked if I’m not careful.
Irvin
We sit outside on the balcony off our bedroom. The cool breeze burns my face—it’s cold, but not to the point where it’ll snow. She sips her hot cocoa and stares at the stars scattered across the sky.
Living with Lilac is strange. We share the same bed, but I haven’t fucked her since before she found out that I trapped her in this marriage. I’m waiting for the perfect moment. She’s very clean and always tidies up after me. She’s just now started eating dinner with me. I’m not stupid enough to believe she’s doing it because she’s come to grips with the fact that she’s mine—she’s doing it to get me to trust her, so I’ll give her freedom. So she can betray me.
I suspect she’s trying to manipulate me. The way she was asking me questions—beyond what’s normal for her abnormal psychology class—gave it away.
