My heart aches at his words. I imagine a younger Irvin all alone with no one to talk to. It makes sense now why he’s a loner. People have let him down before. People he was supposed to trust hurt him.
I place my hands over his. “I believe you. I do. You said that it happened, and I believe you.”
He grips my hand harder and intertwines his fingers with mine. This is not how I expected this to happen. My plan is failing because I didn’t plan on soothing him. I wanted to exploit him, but instead, we linger on a heavy topic. Is he trying to manipulate me? Is this a game for him? I do believe Irvin, but at the same time, Irvin is calculated—two steps ahead of me.
“Does Jameson know?”
“He believes our relationship started my sophomore year in college.”
“You should say something to him. Maybe she did it to him, too.”
“It happened so long ago; it doesn’t even matter anymore.”
I remove my hand, clear my throat, and tuck my legs under my butt.
“Did you accept your diagnosis?”
He shrugs. “I didn’t care what I was. I knew I was different from my friends, and I didn’t feel empathy on the same level as them. I also felt a great deal of loneliness in groups or around people.”
I need to move away from heavy conversations. Lighten the tension between us.
“Do you think people should understand you better?”
He side-eyes me. “I don’t give a fuck if someone understands me better or not.”
“Why?”
“Because people will hate you one minute and love you the next.”
I need to dig deeper. Ask questions that aren’t on the list. See what ways I can manipulate him.
“When do you know to trust someone?”
He freezes, stares at me, and a smirk spreads across his face. He’s onto me. He has to be. Why else is he looking at me as if he’s figured out my secret?
“Why do you want to know that, my princess?”
I straighten my spine. “I have to ask those questions.”
He grins. “Really? For an abnormal psychology class?”
I swallow. “Why would I lie to you?”
He chuckles, strokes his fingers around my neck, and down my collarbone.
“What other questions do you have?”
A chill spreads down my spine. Goosebumps sprout on my skin.
He leaves trails of kisses on my neck. His lips are soft and warm. I sigh, and warmth spreads through my core. Why can’t I push him away? Why can’t I tell him to stop? I’m stuck. Frozen. Even though warning bells are blazing inside my head.
“What are things that make you feel powerless?”
He cups my face, stroking his finger along my lips. “Are there other questions?”
“Yes.”
He pulls me into his lap, wraps his arms around my waist. “Ask away, my princess.”
