When I reach the temple,I stand in the middle of the aisle, shifting my gaze between the altars of the seven Gods. It seems like the right time to pray … but to which one? I’m hoping that perhaps one will speak to me, though any sign would be useful, but in the end, there’s nothing. And so I thank them all, finishing with Etta and Aitara before descending the steps to the library.
I wonder whether Caroline will even be there. Even without seeing her I know she won’t be okay. Hell, I’m certainly not. But hey, misery likes company, right?
I’m still on the second step when a voice echoes through from the depths of the library.
‘No, I told you already, Sanrott himself was encapsulated in stone! Not just his power, but the very God! Why would you just write, “Sanrott’s power”?’
‘Sorry, I’ll make that amendment now.’
Caroline’s response to Rohan is tired. Weary. As if her spark has gone. Though I can’t exactly blame her. The fact that she’s still able to cope with Rohan’s ranting at all … well, it’s more than I could take. Knowing she’s there, I move even more slowly, still not sure if I’m going to approach her. Yet, as if she’s able to sense my presence, she turns to look at me.
‘I’m sorry, Rohan’—she stands and pushes her chair back—‘I’m going to have to finish now.’
‘Now? But we’ve already been interrupted once today!’
‘This bit about Sanrott sounds like a part of the tale we need a whole session for, not just the end of one,’ Caroline replies diplomatically.
I can tell from the scowl on Rohan’s face that he’s not having it.
‘I would think you’d have better grace than to refer to my family’s legacy as a tale, and I’ve got half a mind to?—’
‘Time’s up, Rohan,’ she snaps sharply. ‘If you want to find another scribe that’ll work with you, then good luck. We’re done for today.’
My jaw drops. This is definitely a side of Caroline I’ve not seen before. I wait for Rohan to put up more of an objection, but instead he merely mutters to himself as he grabs his cane and ambles off.
‘I’ll see you tomorrow, Rohan,’ Caroline calls after him as he disappears between the shelves, no doubt regretting her sharp tone.
Only when all we can hear are his footsteps and the clicking of his cane does she turn to me.
‘Congratulations,’ she says dully. That’s it. A single word.
My skin prickles. ‘Congratulations?’
‘On surviving the fourth trial. I heard it was touch and go.’
‘Right. Yeah.’
Her shoulders are stiff. Her face is expressionless. ‘I heard it was an interesting turnout for the prince, too. The rumour mill is having a field day with it. Not to mention the bookies. He was everyone’s favourite.’
‘Right.’
‘I take it you and he are … something.’
Something.I can’t immediately think of a better word to sum up what Kyor and I are, but then again, the last thing I expected when coming here was to talk about him.
‘Yes … listen, I saw Llin’s mother, Morwenna, on the island. Met Carys, too.’
For the first time, Caroline’s facade flickers and pain flashes in her eyes. ‘I assume you’re here because you want something. After all, that’s the only time you turn up, isn’t it? So what do you want, Rose?’
It’s a direct hit and the words cut like a knife in the windpipe because of how true they are.
‘You’re right, I shouldn’t’ve come. I’m sorry. I’ll find it myself.’
I twist away from her to stare at the maze of books. I have no ideawhere to start.
‘I don’t want to blame you, you know,’ Caroline whispers as I start to walk away. ‘I know you didn’t do it deliberately. That you didn’t know the drink was poisoned. But I can’t help it. I can’t help wishing it was you instead.’
I freeze, vision blurring, and look back at her. ‘You’re not the only one who wishes that, Caroline. I promise you.’
