I nod.
“Your mother lived with dignity and chose exactly how she wanted to die, but I did not allow her to push me away.I wasthere.I was Stella Roberts MacLaine’s husband, and I stayed by her side.And not for one second did that woman forget how much she was loved.”
“What if I can’t convince Summer to let me love her?”
He laughs and shakes his head slowly.“That’s not her call to make, Declan.It’s yours.You either love her or you don’t.Which is it?”
“I love her, Dad.”
“No shit, son.I’ve watched you love that girl since the day she set foot on Yosemite Ranch.Then I watched you both try to talk yourselves out of it as the years rolled on.You are two of the most bullheaded creatures ever put on this earth.”
“I know.”I let my head hang.
He stands.“Go to your wife.Get her the best care money can buy.And don’t waste a second.”
I rise.He hugs me and pats my back.
“I love you, Dad.”
“I love you too, son.”
He reaches the door but shoots me a smile before he leaves.“And just so you know, I don’t have the slightest idea how to make hot chocolate, and I could barely figure out how to turn on your damn stove.”
CHAPTER 50
Summer
“Declan, here are the rules,” I say into the bathroom mirror.
Despite all the practicing I’ve been doing, I can’t quite get it right, that perfect balance of gentle and firm.I try again.“First of all, don’t let me complain.Second, you are not permitted to feel sorry for me.The instant you start to feel like this is too much for you to handle, get going.Leave me immediately, before the first hint of resentment takes root.And you have to promise me you’ll find another woman after I die.”
I choke up on the last rule, then hate myself for being so selfish.I have no right to get all emotional at the thought of Declan being happy with another woman after I die.
I splash cold water on my face and try to steady my breath.Maybe I should skip that rule for the time being.It would be horrible if I managed to stay all stable and rational only to lose it when I get to that last bit.If I break down at any point, then he’ll doubt my seriousness when it comes to all the rest of the rules.
“Don’t be a wimp,” I tell my reflection.“You’ve never been a wimp, not once in your whole life.What’s the point of starting now?”
I leave the bathroom, slip on my boots, and grab my coat.I’m filled with the resolve that my new sisters gave me.
And love.
Love has given me resolve.
I put my hand on the doorknob, but it turns on its own and the door swings open.Declan is on the other side.He was coming in to see me as I was going out to see him.
“You don’t knock?”
“There are no locked doors at Yosemite Ranch.We just come and go.Besides, we’re married.”He looks like hell.
“Damn you, Beyoncé,” we say in unison, and then stare at each other.
“I will not be dumped,” Declan says.He isn’t pleading.He’s stating a fact.
“I’m not dumping you.I’m saving you.Those are two different things.”
“Too late.If you’d been interested in saving my ass, you should’ve done it before I figured out you can’t cook, and you don’t put your dirty clothes in the hamper and how you have a horrible habit of jumping without looking.”
“I’m saving you from the ovary thing.”
