“Zirene.” I shifted closer, cupping his face in both hands, forcing him to meet my eyes. “I know you have a darkness. I’ve always known. I saw it the first time we met—that predator lurking beneath the royal mask, the one who would burn worlds if anyone threatened what was his.”
“I know you have a feral side,” I continued. “Probably more unstable than Kaede—and I say that as someone who’s been pinned beneath Kaede when he loses control, who’s felt his possessive fury rattling through our bond like a caged beast.” My thumb traced his cheekbone. “You think I bonded you without understanding what you are?”
“I think you see the best in me.” His voice was hoarse. “I’m afraid of what happens when you see the worst.”
“Then let me tell you something.” I leaned in until our foreheads touched, until his shadows wrapped around me like a second embrace. “I’m your Nova for a reason. Not because I’m naive, or blind, or too human to understand what Aldawi darkness means. I’m your Nova because I’m meant to calm your Shadows. To balance your darkness. To be the light you reach for when everything else goes black.”
His breath shuddered out of him.
“That’s what this bond is,” I pressed on. “That’s what we are. You’re not protecting me by hiding the worst parts of yourself—you’re denying me the chance to do what I was born to do. To love you. All of you. The sovereign and the shadow. The commander and the killer. The male who holds me like I’m precious and the monster who would shred anyone who tries to take me away.”
Silence. The dark purple waves crashed along the stardust sparkling shore.
Then Zirene’s arms tightened around me, and he buried his face in my hair.
“Stars, I don’t deserve you.”
“Probably not.” I smiled against his shoulder. “But you’re stuck with me anyway. And I’m going to reach for you during my training, and you’re going to let me in, and whatever I feel from you—darkness, violence, that feral edge you’re so afraid of—I’m going to love you through it.”
He pulled back just enough to look at me. His eyes were suspiciously bright, his shadows calm for the first time since he’d appeared.
“When you touch my mind,” he said slowly, “when you truly feel what’s inside me... you may see things I’ve never told you. Things I’ve never told anyone.”
“Good.” I kissed him softly. “Then I’ll finally know you as completely as you know me.”
Something cracked in his expression—not breaking but releasing. Like a pressure valve finally loosening after years of building force.
“Train hard,” he said. “Ryzen will push you. Let him. The stronger your reach, the clearer the connection will be.” His hand cupped the back of my neck. “And when you find me out there, Nova—when you feel what war has made me—don’t let go. Promise me.”
“I promise.” I sealed it with another kiss. “I’ll never let go.”
“Good, because the Quaww are relentless, and I don’t know when I will see in you the flesh again.” His jaw tightened, shadows dancing across his features. “Every time we push them back from one sector, they regroup faster than our intel predicted. Someone is feeding them information—ship positions, supply routes, fleet deployments. We’ve lost three cruisers since the war started.”
A muscle on his cheek jumped.
“Good crews. Good warriors. People who trusted me to lead them, and I—” He cut himself off, but I saw the rest in hiseyes. The guilt. The weight of names he’d memorized, faces he couldn’t forget, lives that had ended under his command.
I pressed closer, my hand finding his over my hip. In this private space, I couldn’t offer comfort the way I could in the waking world—but I could offer this. Touch. Presence. The reminder that he wasn’t alone.
“And V’dim and Z’fir?”
“Their orders came through. They remain the same. Lunkai Sol system defense, linked with the female Aldawi fleet.” His fingers traced idle patterns on my hip, an absent gesture that spoke of how desperately he needed to touch me. “Protecting Lunkai. Protecting Aldawi’s origin. Protecting Destima, where the remaining humans and demi-humans gathered.” A pause. “They’ll be leaving soon.”
“I know.” The words tasted like ash. Another fracture. Another piece of my constellation scattered across the void. First Zirene to the war. Now V’dim and Z’fir to this sol system. Soon, me to the CEG station.
How many separations could we survive before the distance between us became too vast to bridge?
“Kaede is going with you to the CEG station.” His tone shifted—still tired, but sharper now, tactical. “You can’t go without him.”
“As if he would let me leave his side.” I huffed. “Ryzen, Zyxel, and Eshe too. Odelm and Xylo are staying with the cubs. Keeping Destima’s Circuli network secure.”
“Good.” His approval was quiet but fierce. “Kaede will die before he lets anything touch you—and Ryzen’s skills will be invaluable if things go wrong. His mental abilities, combined with what you’re learning...”
“If?” I raised an eyebrow.
His laugh held no humor. “When. Things always go wrong, Nova. We just have to be ready to survive them.”
The starlight caught his face as he shifted, and I saw how much the war was eating him alive. And how helpless I was to stop it.
