Killian was a braver man than I was.
“You were an egotistical, big-headed goon who thought he was God’s gift to women.” She kissed her daughter. “Who saw things that weren’t there.”
He laughed, leaning closer still to steal a kiss from my sister. She couldn’t help but smile and her expression softened, leaning in closer for a hug from him with the arm that wasn’t carrying Quinn.
“If you two want to go home early, or make more memories in your old room, we can watch the kids.” I really hoped they’d take the hint and quit the PDA’s.
“Killian’s too old for that.” Claire beamed at me and then him. “All that stopped working.”
“Carry on, woman and we’ll be having words later.” Killian kissed his daughter’s dark curls.
“See, you can only manage words.” Claire shifted out of the way, attention now on the door which swung open, Rose and Lucy appearing through it.
“We’ve found the secret room!” Rose said, sounding a little breathless, or maybe I was imagining it. I was trying not to notice things that weren’t there, rationalising that fear wasn’t having a healthy effect on me, but I was still over-analysing. Every time she moved quickly, I was fearful she wouldn’t be able to catch enough breath; every time she looked paler than normal I’d be thinking whether I needed to take her to the ward to be checked out. If I saw her with a friend from school I’d be spotting how small Rose was, how slender and worrying that it was because of her heart not working as well as it needed to. Should we have noticed something sooner? Should we’ve spotted how petite she was and taken her to a paediatrician? Georgia had told me we’d not made any mistakes and because the hole in her heart wasn’t that big, we shouldn’t be surprised it was only now it’d been discovered, but I hadn’t quite accepted that yet.
“How is it?” I asked, following her out of the dining room and towards the kitchen. Claire followed, Max already peering through the door at the back of the larder. He was holding his phone and taking a photo.
Lucy and Rose squeezed past him, launching themselves back into the space, where five more of our kids had congregated. Eliza, Bear - Callum’s son, Teddy, Tomas – Payton’s eldest, and Nancy. All of our firstborns, although Bear was only half an hour older than his twin, Bea.
Twins. The family curse.
“Dad, is this your name here?” Rose pointed at the name I’d written yesterday, proving that I was taller than everyone now.
It was the small victories in big families. Or tall victories in this case.
“That’s me.”
She sent me a look that reminded me of her mother.
“When did you make that mark?”
“I’ve always made my mark, Rosie. It’s why I’m so amazing.”
Another look. “Serious, Dad, when?”
My heart grew a little more every time she called me dad.
“Yesterday.”
“But you’re a grown-up. Why do you need to put your height on the wall now?” She shook her head at me – Georgia all over.
“Because I wanted to record that I was taller than Max.” When I was five all I’d ever wanted to be was taller than Max, which I knew now was a ridiculous ambition, but hey, I’d achieved it.
“But Uncle Max hasn’t recorded his height so it’s not exactly proof.”
My daughter had a point. “Max, go and stand next to my height line.” I gestured to where I wanted him.
“Why?”
“I need to prove to Rose I’m taller than you.”
He would’ve sworn but there were too many kids there who would’ve told on him.
Begrudgingly he went over there, standing against the wall like he was about to be shot.
“Uncle Jackson and Uncle Callum should do this too.” My daughter was so smart.
“I agree. Then we have proof who’s the tallest.” I didn’t want to tell her to go and find my other brothers because I wanted to wrap her up in cotton wool until the surgeon told me she was well and always would be, but that wasn’t fair. “Can you and Lucy go and find them?”
