She nodded. “If that’s what you want.”
“It’s what I’ve wanted since I discovered that you’re a secret McDonald’s eater.”
She blinked at me a few times, then put Maia down in her chair.
“What do you mean?”
“You were never a hook up. Not for me. I know I was for you and I was alright with that because I was going to take what I could get, but I didn’t want it to end. I don’t want it to end now. I’m pretty set on that. I just want you to be the same.” I sat back down, relaxing into the sofa.
“I’m in love with you. I’ve told you that three times now - ”
“Twice.” I grinned when I interrupted her. “The first time you said 'I love you', you wouldn’t admit you were saying it to me, you wussed out by saying it was to both.”
“Okay, pedant. Twice. You haven’t said it once. I still worry that I might’ve trapped you.” She sat down on the chair where my coat was.
“If you trapped me, you lifted up the lid, told me exactly what the rules were and I crawled inside that cage and closed it myself. If this is trapped, feel free to keep me as your prisoner for the next lifetime and the one after that, because you make my world feel full. You make it feel like everything is perfect just because you’re in it and you’re mine. You make me be a better person and if you don’t know that I’m in love with you and have been for years, then I’m doing it all wrong. But just so we’re clear – I’m in love with you. I love you. I love our daughter and I hope we can give her brothers and sisters but if we can’t I’ll just love you both even more. There. I’ve said it now. Do you believe me?”
She didn’t speak, just nodded, tears flowing down her face while she desperately tried to wipe them away.
“Neva – those are good tears, right?”
She didn’t answer, just dived on me with enough force to knock me back into the cushions, her mouth finding mine and her arms wrapping round me almost too tightly at first.
“They were good tears. I get that now,” I said once we broke for air. “Only good tears.”
She nodded. “That was a speech and a half, Jude Whittingham. How long have you been preparing that?”
I laughed, realising that my cock was hard because Neva was in my lap and our daughter was in the same room.
“I’d like to say since that McDonalds, but that wouldn’t be true. Just now.” I shifted her into a slightly less erotic position. “What do you want to do about your house?” It was currently rented out.
“Keep it and put it in trust for Maia.” She shook her head at me. “She can live there at some point if she wants because she won’t live with us forever.”
I shook my head. “I heard of an all-girls boarding school set up in the middle of Dartmouth, which has no phone reception. We can send her there and then she can live in a turret.”
“Was that the last fairy tale you read to her?” Neva was not even trying not to laugh.
I nodded. “I wasn’t joking about the boarding school.”
She shook her head. “Yeah, not happening. We’ll sort my house out. You know, I’m proud of that house. I worked so hard to get the mortgage for it and save the deposit. Please don’t offer to pay it off.”
“I won’t.” I gave her a kiss, this one more child friendly, should Maia open her eyes and see her parents canoodling. “Will you let me be yours?”
She nodded. “You’re still too young.”
“I’ll always be too young. But I’ll still be yours.” I tucked her hair behind her ear. “Maia looks fast asleep. When’s she due a feed?”
“She had it just before you got home. Why? Do you want to go upstairs?”
I nodded. “It’s been ten days.” My cock thought it was ten years. “Do you want to go upstairs?”
She laughed, which my ego wasn’t sure how to take. “She can’t understand what we’re saying. We don’t actually need to talk in code yet.”
I shrugged. “One day we’ll be talking like this and she’ll be like ‘Mum, Dad, you’re just disgusting.’ A bit like Libbie is with Nate and Amber now.” I pressed a kiss behind her ear.
Her hand was trailing up my chest, under my sweater and T-shirt, playing havoc with my resolve.
I removed her hand, manoeuvring her from my lap, then going to check on my daughter. She was definitely sleeping well, which would last as long as it lasted, meaning we needed to make the most of this. I switched the baby monitor round so there was a camera on her, then turned round to Neva, offering her my hand.
