Dee laughed and sat up, reaching for her mojito. Rowan had made a couple of jugs full before he’d gone out, although I hadn’t had any yet. “He was always excited – like a puppy. Wherever Rowan was or Nate, he kind of bounded behind them. It was cute. But he’s changed. Grown up, I guess.” She closed her eyes and faced up to the sun. “I’m really looking forward to this time next year being able to plan to be away for Christmas. Somewhere sunny. Somewhere with a pool and warm days. Somewhere there’s no fixture on Boxing Day and Rowan and I can stay up past midnight to see in the New Year.”
For a moment I felt lonely. It’d been a long time since I’d had someone to spend New Year’s Eve with – a couple of years in fact. And it had been with Jude. We’d both dodged out on parties that were being held that evening, all of them over before nine because there had been a game on New Year’s Day and we’d had an early kick off. Jude and I had stayed at mine, binge watching an old English sitcom in between feeling each other up. We’d ended up breaking my kitchen table, then he’d set his alarm for just before midnight because he’d wanted to see in the New Year while he was in me, which had just been hilarious and kind of sweet at the same time.
“The freedom you’ll have. It’ll be good.” I knew what Dee had sacrificed for her career, all without the same sort of financial benefits and perks that the men’s team had. Women’s football had grown massively in the last few years, but it was still underfunded compared with the men’s game, with some players having to accept second hand football boots off players with sponsorship deals as they were struggling to afford decent ones themselves.
Thankfully, Manchester Athletic had decided that a rising tide floated all boats and had invested significantly in the women’s team, paying decent wages and supporting at the grassroots level as well. The women’s squad had the same access to the coaches and fitness team that the men’s did, meaning I was as heavily involved with their nutrition as I was the men's.
The women were a damn sight easier to work with. They were definitely less temperamental and didn’t seem to have the same issues with taking advice as some of the men had. That didn’t mean the team didn’t have divas – it did. But Dee wasn’t one.
“It will. I can’t wait.” She looked over at me. “I am worried about Jude though.”
“Jude’s a big boy.” A very big boy in fact, the sort that wrecks you for other men. “And he has a good team around him.”
“I know. I don’t doubt that. But I want him to have what his parents have and then I think he’ll feel more like where he should be.” She put her glass down on the table and lay back down again.
“What do you mean?” I wished my damned heart would stop racing every time I had a conversation about Jude.
“His parents. They got together when they were young and they’ve been together ever since. You know all this, Neva. They’re at every club party.”
She was right, I did. Jude’s parents were really lovely people. His dad was an amazing dancer and had even been on a Saturday night dancing programme, managing to make it to the semi-finals. Jude had similar moves. His mum was smiley and friendly and had always been welcoming with everyone, including some of the WAGs we knew wouldn’t stick around.
“His parents are special. How many people get together at that age and stay together?” I didn’t know of anyone else who’d managed what they had.
Dee made a noise that sounded like she was about to fall asleep. “I know a few. I remember when I first met them; it was like – goals. It was really good, too, because I’d seen my sister with so many shit men.”
“You have Rowan now. He’s kind of like Jude’s dad and I don’t mean that in a weird way.” I figured I was digging a bit of a hole with that.
Dee laughed, thankfully.
“Rowan’s a good man. He was a manwhore before though – let’s not forget that. Then he grew up.” She shifted again, taking her mojito off the table when she was sitting up. “I think they all grow up eventually. Maybe not all of them, but definitely most. Including Jude.”
“Really? He was with that singer for a couple of months – that looked like it was all for show.” I hadn’t liked that. I couldn’t lie and say I wasn’t a jealous person; I totally was. Seeing him with the woman from the girl band, their photos in the gossip columns and hearing his teammates take the piss out of him had really been difficult, even though it had been years since we’d finished hooking up. Or nearly years. Just under two.
“I think he wanted a girlfriend. Genuinely, he’s been hanging round at either ours or Nate and Amber’s since about Easter. He said to me that he wished he could meet someone to just be his person like I was Rowan’s. It wasn’t the right day to say it because Rowan had been a dickhead and bought Toby an electric bike.” She shook her head. “When and if we have kids, I’m going to have to block any online shops. He’s going to be horrendous.”
I couldn’t manage not to smile. “Just set rules around it. Have an agreement. He’s pretty good when you feel strongly about something.” Because Rowan would only ask how high if Dee ever told him to jump.
“I can try that. He’ll want to make a list of all the crap he’s allowed to buy. I’ve already seen stables on his search history.” She sighed and shook her head. “I really hope we have boys. He’ll be a little more rational with them. If he has daughters they’re literally going to have him wrapped around their fingers from day one.” She looked at me, frowning. “How’s the search for Mr Perfect? Any more dates set up for when you get back?”
I shook my head. I hadn’t even checked my online dating apps since we’d been away. “I’m going to look at going it alone. I want a baby more than I want a boyfriend.”
Dee nodded. “I get that. And you have us. I know we’ve already said it, but we’ll support you.” Her eyes turned sly. “You sure there’s no one on the team who’s caught your eye?”
There was that sinking feeling again, the one I remembered from being at school and knowing that the boy I was crushing on was going out with the most popular girl in our year group.
“No. They’re all either in a relationship or too young.” Which was true.
Dee shrugged. “Age is just a number, and most ‘ballers have to grow up quickly to survive. The average age for a male football player to get married is below average for most men– the management encourages them to settle down so they stay scandal-free, or at least that’s the plan. Female footballers are different. They don’t want us to get serious because getting serious means pregnancies or pregnancy scares. By they, I mean a minority.”
“You’re really ready to finish, aren’t you?” I smiled at my friend. I hadn’t known Dee that well on a personal level before she got together with Rowan. It was after that she got to know Amber and Genny more, and she started spending more time at the club.
“I’m really looking forward to one more season, but yeah, I’m kind of ready to be done. I’ve picked up my coaching badges and I like the idea of being involved in the youth teams, but I’m ready. So’s Rowan.” She carried on talking through their plans, staying far away from single players that I should think about dating, which was helpful.
That didn’t stop me thinking about them though, or one in particular.
NEW YEAR’S EVE, JUST UNDER TWO YEARS AGO.
There was a knock at my door, two clear knocks to be precise. I knew exactly who it was and he was early, which I shouldn’t have been surprised about. Jude had gone from being late for almost everything to now taking the military stance of if you weren’t ten minutes early, you were late.
