The drive approaching the village could’ve been used in a game of spot the difference with the drive I’d made in summer. The brightness had been replaced with a myriad of greys, clouds hanging heavy in the sky and the buildings seemed to blend into the horizon with no definable boundaries.
I’d spent six hours in traffic, on motorways and country roads, navigating my way home like a vessel, and instead of the trepidation I felt in June, I was now aching to see my family and the building, to find the familiarity of the smells and sounds and voices that I had missed more than I thought I was.
This wasn’t a retreat. It was a step forward. It felt like progress, only I wasn’t sure towards what. I drove past the cottages and fish and chip shop, the newsagents and then the bar. I saw a group of the fishermen about to enter it, probably after a long morning out at sea, and a cluster of walkers using all the gear.
This was home. The place I needed to be.
A mad woman started to wave at me from the pavement, hands in the air and gesturing wildly. I swerved slightly, convinced the ball of madness that was Catrin was going to walk out in the middle of the road to make me stop.
“What the fuck are you playing at?” I wound down the window and yelled at her. “You could’ve caused an accident!”
Catrin tipped her head back and laughed. “I checked. There was nothing coming.”
She must’ve read the expression on my face as she went from vastly amused to recalcitrant in a half second. “I’m sorry, An. It was a joke. Can I get in? I’ll update you on all the gossip.”
I unlocked the door and she slipped in, immediately putting on the seat warmer. It wasn’t warm; in fact, it felt cooler than late October should’ve.
“Michael’s been seeing an English lecturer from the university.”
I rolled my eyes. My brother was always ‘seeing’ someone, usually some poor, unsuspecting foreign lecturer who really didn’t know any better and thought she’d found the perfect Welsh gentleman. Michael could turn on the charm like no other.
“Tell me something new.”
“Gethin has finally sold his house and moved in with Lucy.”
That was new. They’d only been seeing each other for fifteen years.
“Anything that made him make that sudden decision?”
Catrin shrugged. “He needed a new roof. I believe an acquaintance of yours may have made the purchase. Property developing seems to be one of the many strings to his bow.” She sounded smug. I knew there was more that she wasn’t telling me but I wasn’t going to give her the satisfaction of asking.
“Any sign of the pub in Beaumaris being bought?” I turned the conversation round so quickly the words got whiplash.
“Rumour has it a woman from London has bought it and it’s going to be restored into a gastro-pub. The work on the old estate has been scheduled for February. Will Gabe end up being busy with that?”
“Only if they need the plans tweaking, which they will.”
We’d talked extensively about the project and how much he was looking forward to seeing the buildings restored to something like their former glory with a purpose. “I wonder if they’ll need an architect for the pub?”
“Possibly. The same person has bought the place next door too, so I think they’re planning on merging it into one.”
I saw her eye me. There was something she wanted to tell me, something amusing her.
“Spit it out.”
Without looking, I knew her eyes were widening as if she was innocence personified. “What do you mean?”
“Has he started seeing anyone else?” I had to ask. The thought of it was eating me up. Even though we spent most nights talking until later than we should, the idea that he would meet someone else had been niggling me since he’d been in London. What else hadn’t he told me? Was he trying to spare me the heartache until I got my life back together before breaking the news that he was in love with some other woman?
Catrin was silent for more than a moment, possibly longer than I thought was possible given that she talked in her sleep.
Then she laughed, a belly laugh that echoed around the car. I pulled up on the drive of the guesthouse and stared at her as soon as the car was in park. “Is he?”
“Jesus mother of all things cheese. No. Seriously. No. He’s, well, he’s changed. He’s more outgoing and hides less in his barn. But he talks about you a lot more recently and I know he’s really looking forward to you coming home. As soon as anyone mentions it, his whole face lights up.”
“So he’s not seeing anyone else?”
Catrin shook her head and laughed. “Anya, he’s fucking crazy about you. The only thing he’s been getting intimate with is his hand.”
