I’m not going to lie—when people find out I play for the Bears they generally don’t seem so…put out. I was expecting surprise and, honestly, maybe intrigue. But Ellie does seem to continually catch me off guard. And right now, I think I am reading acute distress in her voice. Is it because I didn’t tell her yesterday or something else?
I open my mouth to respond and then close it, instead opting to just give her a nod. Ellie goes a little pale at my confirmation and slowly gets up from the couch. I watch her walk to the kitchen where she gets a glass of water.
“Do you need anything before you go?” she asks with a flat tone.
Shit.I am being dismissed.
I get up and head toward the door to grab my jacket and slip my shoes on. How do I fix this? “No, I’m okay. I’m really sorry about this, Ellie. Can I call you later today?”
Ellie grabs a dishcloth and starts wiping an already clean counter. She looks up at me and holds my gaze. Something in her eyes sends a pit into my stomach, but I can’t name it.
“Sure,” she says.
I swallow and nod and then let myself out the door. I’d love to figure out how to unfuck this right now, but I think I’m already later than I’ve ever been. A fact that’s not bothering me as much as it should. Not nearly as much as the fact that I might have messed things up with Ellie before we’ve even really started.
It’s not until I get to my car that I realize I never even got her number.
CHAPTER NINE
ELLIE
SIX MONTHS AGO
There’ssomething about the late summer sun that’s so…melancholy. I’m not really sure why I feel that way. I don’t think it’s about summer ending. I like summer, sure, but Ilovefall. Maybe it’s memories of going back to school? Or maybe it’s the coming back from a summer vacation that I associate with the close of August.
My eyes are shut and the low sun is flickering through the trees, an alternating red and black flashing behind my eyelids as we take the train up the coast toward Ogunquit Beach. We’ll still have to take a car from the train stop into town, but suffering through ten minutes is a hell of a lot better than twohours. My stomach clenches at the thought. Josh and I are joining our friends John, Chandler, Zoey, and Graham at a rental house like we always have, but it’s feeling different than it has in the past. This might be the last one for a while. Maybe ever.
I got my job offer at General last week and I’d be crazy not to take it. Iwantto take it. But it means our favorite vacation spot is no longer an hour and a half train ride away. Not to mention how much farther we’ll be from our friends. I feel a pang ofworry at the prospect of not having a group of friends around in Minneapolis, but I remind myself that Josh and Dev will be with me and I will make new friends. Hopefully.
We haven’t talked about it much, but I assume Josh will move with me sometime next month unless he has issues with his job transfer. I guess I could go first and he could follow if it comes to that. I’ve never lived fully on my own, so even the idea of doing it for a month or two is a little intimidating, but I’m sure it’ll be okay.
After we get off at the train station, we make our way to the small line of taxis waiting for passengers. We slide into the first one and give the driver the name of the restaurant we’re meeting at, knowing we don’t have enough time to drop our bags off at the rental house first.
I can feel Josh watching me out of the corner of my eye. I buckle my seat belt, pulling it tight, and close my eyes.Ten minutes.One minute, ten times. I decide to count backward from sixty, ticking down one finger every time I get to zero.
I have one finger still up and am at twenty-seven when I feel the car stop and hear the driver repeat the name of the restaurant we gave him. Cautiously opening my eyes, I sigh in relief when I see the familiar building outside the window. I quickly unbuckle and get out of the car. Josh pays the driver and walks over to me, grabbing the bag from my hand.
“You good?”
I give a jerky nod and forge ahead into the restaurant. Thank god Zoey promised I can drive her car while we’re here. And double thanks that our house is walking distance to the beach.
As we get inside, we’re met with crowded-restaurant ambiance and struggle to give the hostess the name on the reservation. She finally hears us and lets us know our group has already been seated. As she leads us to our table I take in the old floors and cozy seating. The restaurant looks like it was just ahouse once, with lots of separate rooms instead of one big space. The lighting is low and the flickering candles add to the warm atmosphere. There’s a reason we make a point to eat here every time we visit. I feel myself relax and get a little giddy at seeing my friends in one of my favorite restaurants. I do my best to hang on to that feeling so I don’t get swallowed by the looming finality this trip represents.
I see Zoey first and nearly squeal. She’s been gone most of the summer visiting her family in California and this is the first time I’m seeing her since early June. She’s a high school teacher, and while I wouldn’t want her job, her free summers always make me jealous.Lucky bitch.I met Zoey my freshman year of college and we roomed together every year of school after that. She’s sporting a true San Diego tan and her dark hair is down in waves. Graham, her boyfriend, smartly moves out of the way as she nearly loses a shoe trying to get out of the round booth.
“Ellieeeeeeeee!” she sings as she hugs me so tight I can barely breathe. I do my best to give her the same treatment, but she’s got about three inches on me and a smidge of muscle. Maybe more.
I should really join her for that stupid yoga sculpt class she keeps begging me to go to.Ugh.
“Hi. You look hot,” I tell her, with not an ounce of jealousy. I scan her tan legs again and sigh.
“Oh hush, you know it’s the tan. It’s like makeup for your body.” She laughs andscoots back into the booth, making room for me and Josh. I slide in and say hi to everyone else as Josh gives John their signature man-hug before settling next to me. His longtime friend thankfully made an excellent choice of partner, and now he and Chandler fit right in with the four of us. Chandler gives me a big smile and I promise her a hug when we all get out of the booth.
“I want to talk to all of you, but I’m starving so can we order first?” I ask with a guilty smile.
Josh laughs and hands me a menu, which I immediately begin to scan. I’m looking at the drink list when the waitress comes over to take our orders. I order a fancy cocktail and the salmon and try my hardest to ignore my grumbling stomach. I should’ve eaten before we left.
“So what’s up with everyone?” Josh asks, dropping a hand on my bouncing knee.
