A prickle ran its way up the back of Fran’s neck. He was talking about his ex. Had to be. And reading between the lines, she surmised Johnny’s wife must have slept with his brother – Fran assumed there wouldn’t be any other explanation capableof creating such distress. It would certainly explain why the brothers had been fighting in the chateau gardens.
‘How the hell do I ever deal with this? How are we going to explain it to Estelle?’
Fran stayed quiet, partly because she had no idea what to say, partly because the knot in her throat and the pricking in the corners of her own eyes were threatening to overwhelm her, and the last thing Johnny needed was more tears. He needed support. But the way he was expressing his emotions with such rawness had taken Fran aback and she wasn’t sure what to do with how it made her feel.
‘I’m not sure I’m the right person …’ Fran made to stand, sinking back into the chair when Johnny slid into the other, shaking his head.
‘I’m sorry, I’m not sure I’m making much sense. I didn’t mean to upset you. It just seems like … you’re … put it this way, you’re the closest I’ve got to someone I can confide in right now. Someone who will give me an honest opinion. The closest thing I have to a friend.’
Johnny lulled into silence; his gaze fixed through the window again.
‘If I can help, I will,’ Fran said.
Eventually, his exhausted gaze settled on hers. ‘Thanks.’
‘Did you sleep at all, last night?’ she asked.
A slight shake of his head was answer enough. ‘I suppose it makes sense; it explains why she wouldn’t tell me who it was. She knew it would destroy absolutely everything.’
Fran frowned. ‘But they must have known you’d find out eventually.’
A frustrated huff had to suffice as an answer, Johnny seemed lost to his thoughts again. A beat of time passed; dust motesfloated in the bright sunshine flooding through the window. Then he spoke, aggression fighting for control.
‘I’m a total idiot, that much is clear.’
‘No, you’re not.’
‘I am. All I’ve ever tried to do is make the best life I could for the people I love. The people who I believed had my best interests at heart, too. And all the time they’ve been playing me off behind my back.’ He swung around to stare at her, anger flashing in his eyes. ‘I didn’t listen, not properly. Natalie all but told me the other day, she asked me to look after Noel. Why else would she say that? I was just too stupid to hear what she really meant.’
‘I think you’re being very hard on yourself.’ Fran sighed, weighing up what to say next. ‘It took me so long to trust my instincts where my ex was concerned. To begin to question his behaviour. So very long.’
Fran wasn’t sure whether a comparison between two very different relationships was helpful, but it was all she had to offer.
‘And it wasn’t as though I had invested anything like as much into our relationship as you have. We weren’t married. Hadn’t even spoken about having children.’
Johnny frowned. ‘Do you think maybe the more you have riding on something, the less you want to believe anything is wrong?’
‘Maybe.’ Fran felt the corners of her lips twitch into a smile. ‘It didn’t feel that way at the time, though. If you want competition in the “total idiot” stakes, I’ll go head-to-head with you.’
‘Challenge accepted.’
Fran couldn’t help but notice a glimmer of a smile skirting around the edge of Johnny’s features, too.
‘The irony of mine was that all the things which originally attracted me to him were what he ended up using against me.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘He’s a professional magician. Goes around to posh dinner parties and events, doing magic at the dinner table – that kind of thing. Anyway, it was his sleight of hand and the way he was so clever with deception which attracted me in the first place. He seemed exciting. A bit dangerous. Unpredictable.’ Fran bit back a sigh. ‘And he lived up to it all, one way or another. He slept around but had me convinced it was all in my own head. That I was the one at fault, I was the one who didn’t measure up.’
She shook her head. Saying it out loud made her hear how manipulative Victor had been. How lucky she was, in fact, to have got away. How long it had taken her to be able to be this objective.
‘That’s so wrong, Fran. What a dick,’ Johnny said.
‘Well, yes. He was.’
‘Are you OK now?’
‘Getting there.’ For the first time in a very long time, Fran actually believed herself. Johnny studied her for a while. Eventually he nodded.
